Detroit wrote:
The 60+ YO empty nesters we hang out with get it. They've never once asked us why we don't want kids. They usually say things like "you're smart" or "I wish we had done that". ol:
But the people in their mid-40's are really the worst IMO. We're BY FAR the youngest people on our street...most people our age can't afford where we live. There's a certain couple that live across the street from us that used to ask us about the kid situation...and EVERY TIME we would tell them the same thing "we're not kid people"..."but why" they'd push...and that's when I went full douche like you did...I pointed at the house and said "I was 33 when we bought that...when did you move here?" It's funny now, they don't talk to us. But every time we're out on the porch getting having fun and they get home from whatever kid thing they were at, they give us the most intense faces.
My wifes sister just popped out twin the pressure her family is giving my wife to care is immense. She's flying out there next week to fulfill the obligation to visit, but has zero interest in dealing with them. Many people can just not comprehend not being excited about It works for some people, but not all. Leave it the fuck alone.
You'll change your mind.
Oh man, that's my favorite.
We once responded to that question with "well, we can't"...and this lady went an full "there's still hope! Invetro or whatever bs blah blah blah blah" Wow.
The bold part doesn't really change with age. Even at 48 we still get grilled by people if we have kids, and when we happily say no we get asked why not... Happened twice in Hawaii by two couples we met at the restaurant bars while waiting to be seated. Each time the couple got kind of aggressive about it I simply asked "Where are you staying on the Island?" When they gave me the name of the hotel I pulled a douchy move and said "Well, since we don't have kids we came here for two weeks, on two islands. We flew first class on every flight and rented a $4M home on Maui and a $3M home on Kauai. We go where we want, how we want, when we want and almost live a second life in Vegas. We never need a babysitter, or to burden a family member with watching kids. That's why we don't have any kids and never wanted them."
I love seeing the look of shock, horror and disbelief on a mother's face when I drop that bit of information.
I told my sister-in-law that kids are horrible. First they cry all the time, then when they stop that they start asking stupid questions over and over in places you would rather they just shut up. This was after one of the discussions with a stranger and having 2 kids herself she kinda frowned and then agreed.
...and EVERY TIME we would tell them the same thing "we're not kid people"..."but why" they'd push...
"Oh, I've had a vasectomy and my wife just had a hysterectomy, so...."
As the only published author in a well-known motorcycle publication in the room...
The bold part doesn't really change with age. Even at 48 we still get grilled by people if we have kids, and when we happily say no we get asked why not... Happened twice in Hawaii by two couples we met at the restaurant bars while waiting to be seated. Each time the couple got kind of aggressive about it I simply asked "Where are you staying on the Island?" When they gave me the name of the hotel I pulled a douchy move and said "Well, since we don't have kids we came here for two weeks, on two islands. We flew first class on every flight and rented a $4M home on Maui and a $3M home on Kauai. We go where we want, how we want, when we want and almost live a second life in Vegas. We never need a babysitter, or to burden a family member with watching kids. That's why we don't have any kids and never wanted them."
I love seeing the look of shock, horror and disbelief on a mother's face when I drop that bit of information.
I told my sister-in-law that kids are horrible. First they cry all the time, then when they stop that they start asking stupid questions over and over in places you would rather they just shut up. This was after one of the discussions with a stranger and having 2 kids herself she kinda frowned and then agreed.
The 60+ YO empty nesters we hang out with get it. They've never once asked us why we don't want kids. They usually say things like "you're smart" or "I wish we had done that".
But the people in their mid-40's are really the worst IMO. We're BY FAR the youngest people on our street...most people our age can't afford where we live. There's a certain couple that live across the street from us that used to ask us about the kid situation...and EVERY TIME we would tell them the same thing "we're not kid people"..."but why" they'd push...and that's when I went full douche like you did...I pointed at the house and said "I was 33 when we bought that...when did you move here?" It's funny now, they don't talk to us. But every time we're out on the porch getting having fun and they get home from whatever kid thing they were at, they give us the most intense faces.
My wifes sister just popped out twin the pressure her family is giving my wife to care is immense. She's flying out there next week to fulfill the obligation to visit, but has zero interest in dealing with them. Many people can just not comprehend not being excited about It works for some people, but not all. Leave it the fuck alone.
I love my kids and wouldn't change a thing.....BUT having them was a huge sacrifice (freedom, sex life, money). For me it was and is worth it, but I can definitely see the other point of view.
We're getting the "when is the next one coming?" a lot lately, which is immediately shot down with a
I absolutely love my munchkin, she's the center of my world, but we're not having another. She's a really good kiddo, IMO, and sacrifices are made but I think that for the most part she's well liked when we're out with friends who don't have kids.
Detroit wrote: ↑Fri Jun 28, 2019 12:37 pm
All the people our age around us just want to talk about or sports or going way too into something. Like one dude I was talking to recently I mentioned liking whiskey/scotch. He suggested we should drink some together because he was "a huge whiskey guy". OK, cool. Then he starts going on and on about his 100+ bottle collection, how expensive the bottles are, how hard they are to get, etc, etc but nothing about the tastes. BRUH All I want to do is sit on my porch and drink some fucking Scotch. I don't care what it costs or how rare it is. If I like it, I like it.
Meanwhile, my "closest" friend is 61. He's AF and will just buy bottles of scotch that "sound neat". He'll bring it over and we'll just talk about random life shit or whatever while we sip the bottle down on the porch. We've done this with $500 bottles before and he never once mentioned price, rarity, etc. He opened it up, took a sip, and said "holy fuck", poured me a glass...and that was it. I'll reciprocate, but not with stuff that expensive. Doesn't matter, for us it's more about the relaxation and friendship. We're not trying to impress anyone
I don't care enough about things and status and whatever to get along with the people my age it seems. Everyone's just trying to impress one another, which I DGAF about.
I have a really hard time with the sportsball thing as well. I mean, I enjoy going to Panthers games, I like being outside, it's our home team, I the aspect is fun... but once people start talking stats or what they saw on TV last night or whatever...
that sounds more like my high school/community college friends, literally 60% of what they talk about is more I played house bball all through middle/high school, tried out for junior varsity and wasn't far off for making it. Basketball and being Turkish was pretty much my identity. I mostly just care about Basketball and Soccer where I would call myself a decent fan to say the very least, but I don't go out of my way unless its a really big game or towards end of the season.
Last edited by MexicanYarisTK on Fri Jun 28, 2019 1:31 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Detroit wrote:
The 60+ YO empty nesters we hang out with get it. They've never once asked us why we don't want kids. They usually say things like "you're smart" or "I wish we had done that". ol:
But the people in their mid-40's are really the worst IMO. We're BY FAR the youngest people on our street...most people our age can't afford where we live. There's a certain couple that live across the street from us that used to ask us about the kid situation...and EVERY TIME we would tell them the same thing "we're not kid people"..."but why" they'd push...and that's when I went full douche like you did...I pointed at the house and said "I was 33 when we bought that...when did you move here?" It's funny now, they don't talk to us. But every time we're out on the porch getting having fun and they get home from whatever kid thing they were at, they give us the most intense faces.
My wifes sister just popped out twin the pressure her family is giving my wife to care is immense. She's flying out there next week to fulfill the obligation to visit, but has zero interest in dealing with them. Many people can just not comprehend not being excited about It works for some people, but not all. Leave it the fuck alone.
Apex wrote: ↑Fri Jun 28, 2019 1:25 pm
We're getting the "when is the next one coming?" a lot lately, which is immediately shot down with a
I absolutely love my munchkin, she's the center of my world, but we're not having another. She's a really good kiddo, IMO, and sacrifices are made but I think that for the most part she's well liked when we're out with friends who don't have kids.
Us DINKs know how to pull the wool over the eyes of our friends that are parents.
If you really have a good kid then it's quite easy for me to like them. Our best friends have two boys that are incredible, because they were brought up right and there was some luck there as well.
Some are just going to be bad, no matter how you raise them, so the risk wasn't worth the possible reward for me. I would either have to have been a drill instructor, or be a drill instructor that "beat their kid within an inch of their life", according to the lefties out here in California. When I grew up out here, adults could smack down any kid that was unattended and acting up in public. Now if you even spank your kid, or grab their arm when they are stepping off a curb to avoid getting hit by a speeding truck running a red light it's child abuse and you'll get a visit from CPS.
Your kid hits another kid at school in self defense? Prepare for a lawsuit.
Apex wrote: ↑Fri Jun 28, 2019 1:25 pm
We're getting the "when is the next one coming?" a lot lately, which is immediately shot down with a
I absolutely love my munchkin, she's the center of my world, but we're not having another. She's a really good kiddo, IMO, and sacrifices are made but I think that for the most part she's well liked when we're out with friends who don't have kids.
Seriously?!
Why are people so fucking nosey? None, one and done, or 10 and done, whatever works for the couple. I wish people would just mind their own damned business.
Detroit wrote: ↑Fri Jun 28, 2019 10:01 am
I have lost touch with everyone I went to high school with. SAD!
I'm actually quite fortunate in that regard. We had a pretty tight group in high school and I still do things with about 4 guys. One of them was with me when we went out with Max! We still have common interests and enjoy each other's company.
Detroit wrote:Buy 911s instead of diamonds.
Johnny_P wrote: ↑Thu Feb 09, 2023 3:21 pm
Earn it and burn it, Val.
max225 wrote: ↑Mon May 01, 2023 5:35 pm
Yes it's a cool car. But prepare the lube/sawdust.
Apex wrote: ↑Fri Jun 28, 2019 1:25 pm
We're getting the "when is the next one coming?" a lot lately, which is immediately shot down with a
I absolutely love my munchkin, she's the center of my world, but we're not having another. She's a really good kiddo, IMO, and sacrifices are made but I think that for the most part she's well liked when we're out with friends who don't have kids.
Us DINKs know how to pull the wool over the eyes of our friends that are parents.
If you really have a good kid then it's quite easy for me to like them. Our best friends have two boys that are incredible, because they were brought up right and there was some luck there as well.
Some are just going to be bad, no matter how you raise them, so the risk wasn't worth the possible reward for me. I would either have to have been a drill instructor, or be a drill instructor that "beat their kid within an inch of their life", according to the lefties out here in California. When I grew up out here, adults could smack down any kid that was unattended and acting up in public. Now if you even spank your kid, or grab their arm when they are stepping off a curb to avoid getting hit by a speeding truck running a red light it's child abuse and you'll get a visit from CPS.
Your kid hits another kid at school in self defense? Prepare for a lawsuit.
I just have no interest in fucking a kid up. My parents did it to me, my wife's to her, I'd do it to mine...I have zero reference for how to properly parent, probably best I just don't.
I also hate kid shit, and don't want to spend every weekend for the rest of my prime years at baseball games, swim meets, like that. Some people really get into that, and that's awesome for them...but not for me.
Desertbreh wrote: ↑Thu Oct 17, 2019 3:05 pm
DFD. The forum where everybody makes the same choices and then tells anybody trying to join the club that they are the stupidest motherfucker to ever walk the earth.
It's tougher as a couple for me. I'm really lucky with Allison in that she is very friendly and open minded, so she can befriend my friend's and their wives/gfs, but I feel like it's rare that I really hit it off with her friend's husbands. I hate the like "talk about what I do for business" conversations and stuff. I really only hit it off with people who like cars.
All the people our age around us just want to talk about or sports or going way too into something. Like one dude I was talking to recently I mentioned liking whiskey/scotch. He suggested we should drink some together because he was "a huge whiskey guy". OK, cool. Then he starts going on and on about his 100+ bottle collection, how expensive the bottles are, how hard they are to get, etc, etc but nothing about the tastes. BRUH All I want to do is sit on my porch and drink some fucking Scotch. I don't care what it costs or how rare it is. If I like it, I like it.
Meanwhile, my "closest" friend is 61. He's AF and will just buy bottles of scotch that "sound neat". He'll bring it over and we'll just talk about random life shit or whatever while we sip the bottle down on the porch. We've done this with $500 bottles before and he never once mentioned price, rarity, etc. He opened it up, took a sip, and said "holy fuck", poured me a glass...and that was it. I'll reciprocate, but not with stuff that expensive. Doesn't matter, for us it's more about the relaxation and friendship. We're not trying to impress anyone
I don't care enough about things and status and whatever to get along with the people my age it seems. Everyone's just trying to impress one another, which I DGAF about.
This is how it was when I went out to Denver two months ago to visit my friend. He poured us some whiskey, we went up to his rooftop, sipped them while we talked about life and caught up, then took it back down to his place when the whiskey ran out and we just chilled on the couch talking more and shooting tequila cheers-ing to little life victories for each other that came up in conversation. 1000% would rather do that than go hit a bar and not be able to enjoy the company of my bros with the crowd of people.
Detroit wrote: ↑Fri Jun 28, 2019 10:01 am
I have lost touch with everyone I went to high school with. SAD!
I'm actually quite fortunate in that regard. We had a pretty tight group in high school and I still do things with about 4 guys. One of them was with me when we went out with Max! We still have common interests and enjoy each other's company.
#metoo
My college friends are probably the closest other than my one real friend in Charlotte, but I also have several close friends from high school I still enjoy spending time with. I haven't met nearly as good people, haven't really made any new friends in about 9-10 years.
ol:
having fun and they get home from whatever kid
thing they were at, they give us the most intense
faces.
the pressure her family is giving my wife to care is immense. She's flying out there next week to fulfill the obligation to visit, but has zero interest in dealing with them. Many people can just not comprehend not being excited about
AF and will just buy bottles of scotch that "sound neat". He'll bring it over and we'll just talk about random life shit or whatever while we sip the bottle down on the porch. We've done this with $500 bottles before and he never once mentioned price, rarity, etc. He opened it up, took a sip, and said "holy fuck", poured me a glass...and that was it. I'll reciprocate, but not with stuff that expensive. Doesn't matter, for us it's more about the relaxation and friendship. We're not trying to impress anyone
I played house bball all through middle/high school, tried out for junior varsity and wasn't far off for making it. Basketball and being Turkish was pretty much my identity. I mostly just care about Basketball and Soccer where I would call myself a decent fan to say the very least, but I don't go out of my way unless its a really big game or towards end of the season.
Seriously?!
I really only hit it off with people who like cars.
