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Finally got my year end corporate book keeping done and sent out to my accountant. This year has been extra hard to get any shit around the house done especially book keeping with the kiddies around a lot more, my only real gripe with the self-employment piece otherwise I couldn't ask for a better setup.

Wife works for government, but she continues to battle to keep contract positions in higher up rolls. She just won another competition (third one so far over three years) for a six month contract to do Program Analyst work which keeps her out of Employment Services/front line job which unfortunately will get shut down entirely next year as the government decided that the employment training and management portion should get outsourced to a private agency. They've actually piloted this last year and the agencies have all failed since the clients being sent to them deal with barriers that are out of most recruiters comfort level... like alcoholism, or homelessness, or schizophrenia etc. I shake my head at that move since they already have tried and failed to address these core flaws, her department specializes in rebuilding the lives of broken people, its not just a resume update. All of the people working in Employment Services are getting dumped back into core roles such as the Case Worker and will be displacing those with lower seniority. Worse then that, the Case Workers will all eventually be laid off and the government will issue benefits directly to those requesting them, no screening or accountability.

Next in line for gov spending in a big way is housing, the feds are going to pump huge infrastructure projects into major cities to get people off the streets and housed. I think this is a pretty need idea, just hope it actually works. I can see how getting someone housed is the first and best step towards self-care and financial independence from the system ultimately. :popcorn: on these updated gov services Canada side.

And they say that gov is the place to be for work, maybe only as a politician but definitely glad I lean on my own network and talents at a crazy time like this. We are really lucky to have a ying-yang type careers because it helps with the ups and downs of different cycles like this one. I'm genuinely sad for us as a society, it is such a rat race and financial burden to just live and eat. :sad:
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I countered for slightly higher. Results pending but I’ll accept it either way.

Cash flow sheet looks kind of ugly. Basically can’t afford to own 2 cars on this salary unless they’re both complete shitkickers. Funny how that works, you go from being able to afford whatever you want, to you have to drive a beat up old hybrid to make ends meet on a salary greater than juan hunnit. I mean all my extra cash will have to go to college funds.

I have no idea how people that make $10/hr get by.

It’s hard telling myself this was the right call. When I know I could have got an additional $20k/yr salary at the chemical plant, which would have required a move to Wilmington Delaware which is cheaper to live than Philly. Our house would have sold quick for high dollar and I could have bought something down there for pennies with a yard and more room.

Sigh. Too late now. We will see how this goes.
Last edited by Johnny_P on Wed Sep 23, 2020 9:39 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Tarspin wrote: Sun Sep 20, 2020 11:21 am Finally got my year end corporate book keeping done and sent out to my accountant. This year has been extra hard to get any shit around the house done especially book keeping with the kiddies around a lot more, my only real gripe with the self-employment piece otherwise I couldn't ask for a better setup.

Wife works for government, but she continues to battle to keep contract positions in higher up rolls. She just won another competition (third one so far over three years) for a six month contract to do Program Analyst work which keeps her out of Employment Services/front line job which unfortunately will get shut down entirely next year as the government decided that the employment training and management portion should get outsourced to a private agency. They've actually piloted this last year and the agencies have all failed since the clients being sent to them deal with barriers that are out of most recruiters comfort level... like alcoholism, or homelessness, or schizophrenia etc. I shake my head at that move since they already have tried and failed to address these core flaws, her department specializes in rebuilding the lives of broken people, its not just a resume update. All of the people working in Employment Services are getting dumped back into core roles such as the Case Worker and will be displacing those with lower seniority. Worse then that, the Case Workers will all eventually be laid off and the government will issue benefits directly to those requesting them, no screening or accountability.

Next in line for gov spending in a big way is housing, the feds are going to pump huge infrastructure projects into major cities to get people off the streets and housed. I think this is a pretty need idea, just hope it actually works. I can see how getting someone housed is the first and best step towards self-care and financial independence from the system ultimately. :popcorn: on these updated gov services Canada side.

And they say that gov is the place to be for work, maybe only as a politician but definitely glad I lean on my own network and talents at a crazy time like this. We are really lucky to have a ying-yang type careers because it helps with the ups and downs of different cycles like this one. I'm genuinely sad for us as a society, it is such a rat race and financial burden to just live and eat. :sad:
Crazy times. I know a lot of .gov workers in philly that got laid off. Funds are gone. So a lot of these good outreach programs are bankrupt and defunded to pay for whatever else is more important like militarized police equipment or misconduct lawsuits.

How does your wife like the program analyst position? How did she get into that? (If too complex or personal an answer happy to email back and forth with you). I’d love a position like that in DC.
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Johnny_P wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 9:32 am I countered for slightly higher. Results pending but I’ll accept it either way.

Cash flow sheet looks kind of ugly. Basically can’t afford to own 2 cars on this salary unless they’re both complete shitkickers. Funny how that works, you go from being able to afford whatever you want, to you have to drive a beat up old hybrid to make ends meet on a salary greater than juan hunnit. I mean all my extra cash will have to go to college funds.

I have no idea how people that make $10/hr get by.
Congratulations. Don’t look or think too hard right now. You just need stable income coming into the household. That will give you and Lisa more freedom to decide and make choices. You will live a good life with the commute and time with family.

Start looking to sell the STI and maybe use some of the money to throw at the CMax to make it good to run and drive, or trade both in at fled’s Toyota dealer and get a RAV4 and drive off into the sunset.
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Desertbreh wrote: Thu Oct 17, 2019 3:05 pm DFD. The forum where everybody makes the same choices and then tells anybody trying to join the club that they are the stupidest motherfucker to ever walk the earth.
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Johnny_P wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 9:32 am I countered for slightly higher. Results pending but I’ll accept it either way.

Cash flow sheet looks kind of ugly. Basically can’t afford to own 2 cars on this salary unless they’re both complete shitkickers. Funny how that works, you go from being able to afford whatever you want, to you have to drive a beat up old hybrid to make ends meet on a salary greater than juan hunnit. I mean all my extra cash will have to go to college funds.

I have no idea how people that make $10/hr get by.

It’s hard telling myself this was the right call. When I know I could have got an additional $20k/yr salary at the chemical plant, which would have required a move to Wilmington Delaware which is cheaper to live than Philly. Our house would have sold quick for high dollar and I could have bought something down there for pennies with a yard and more room.

Sigh. Too late now. We will see how this goes.
I thought Lisa was firmly rooted on staying in Philly? Doesn’t that make Wilmington a non-issue?
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Johnny_P wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 9:32 am I countered for slightly higher. Results pending but I’ll accept it either way.

Cash flow sheet looks kind of ugly. Basically can’t afford to own 2 cars on this salary unless they’re both complete shitkickers. Funny how that works, you go from being able to afford whatever you want, to you have to drive a beat up old hybrid to make ends meet on a salary greater than juan hunnit. I mean all my extra cash will have to go to college funds.

I have no idea how people that make $10/hr get by.

It’s hard telling myself this was the right call. When I know I could have got an additional $20k/yr salary at the chemical plant, which would have required a move to Wilmington Delaware which is cheaper to live than Philly. Our house would have sold quick for high dollar and I could have bought something down there for pennies with a yard and more room.

Sigh. Too late now. We will see how this goes.
I honestly don't see how people get by either...I guess that's how people end up with a bunch of debt and no savings because life is expensive.

I know the feels of no longer being able to afford a lifestyle. It's a big reason why we're moving, but hard to accept when you're entering your "prime earning years".
Oh well, at this point it's just best to focus on the positives. You've got a growing family, a wife you love in a city you love. Material things can come and go, but those core things can't. Steady income to provide the essentials is better than nothing.
Desertbreh wrote: Tue Oct 10, 2017 6:40 pm My guess would be that Chris took some time off because he has read the dialogue on this page 1,345 times and decided to spend some of his free time doing something besides beating a horse to death.
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Oh, and about college...

When I was born, the state of Michigan offered this college savings program. At the time I was born, if you invested ~1 year of state college tuition into the program, the child got 4 years of tuition at a state college paid for when the time came. The catch was I had to go to a state college (which in MI is perfectly fine), and I had to graduate in 4 years (which I busted my butt to do), but I wonder if those sorts of things still exist? Would be worth looking into perhaps. Maybe a lump sum now could replace regular investments?
Desertbreh wrote: Tue Oct 10, 2017 6:40 pm My guess would be that Chris took some time off because he has read the dialogue on this page 1,345 times and decided to spend some of his free time doing something besides beating a horse to death.
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Detroit wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 10:25 am Oh, and about college...

When I was born, the state of Michigan offered this college savings program. At the time I was born, if you invested ~1 year of state college tuition into the program, the child got 4 years of tuition at a state college paid for when the time came. The catch was I had to go to a state college (which in MI is perfectly fine), and I had to graduate in 4 years (which I busted my butt to do), but I wonder if those sorts of things still exist? Would be worth looking into perhaps. Maybe a lump sum now could replace regular investments?
Most state colleges are more than enough. Especially for undergraduate. My parents had no idea about college savings plans and all that. Luckily I got scholarships and got paid to go to a state school that I could commute to. I got in to UF and FSU but decided to spend less and save more. Free degree > more lifestyle debt even if tuition is covered.
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Desertbreh wrote: Thu Oct 17, 2019 3:05 pm DFD. The forum where everybody makes the same choices and then tells anybody trying to join the club that they are the stupidest motherfucker to ever walk the earth.
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SAWCE wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 10:10 am
Johnny_P wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 9:32 am I countered for slightly higher. Results pending but I’ll accept it either way.

Cash flow sheet looks kind of ugly. Basically can’t afford to own 2 cars on this salary unless they’re both complete shitkickers. Funny how that works, you go from being able to afford whatever you want, to you have to drive a beat up old hybrid to make ends meet on a salary greater than juan hunnit. I mean all my extra cash will have to go to college funds.

I have no idea how people that make $10/hr get by.

It’s hard telling myself this was the right call. When I know I could have got an additional $20k/yr salary at the chemical plant, which would have required a move to Wilmington Delaware which is cheaper to live than Philly. Our house would have sold quick for high dollar and I could have bought something down there for pennies with a yard and more room.

Sigh. Too late now. We will see how this goes.
I thought Lisa was firmly rooted on staying in Philly? Doesn’t that make Wilmington a non-issue?
We are not firmly rooted here at all. There are benefits to staying Philly local such as Grandparents. But Wilmington isn’t far. A move now would be extra complicated though.
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Detroit wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 10:25 am Oh, and about college...

When I was born, the state of Michigan offered this college savings program. At the time I was born, if you invested ~1 year of state college tuition into the program, the child got 4 years of tuition at a state college paid for when the time came. The catch was I had to go to a state college (which in MI is perfectly fine), and I had to graduate in 4 years (which I busted my butt to do), but I wonder if those sorts of things still exist? Would be worth looking into perhaps. Maybe a lump sum now could replace regular investments?
Yeah one of the many things I need to look into with a financial planner. First course of action will be consolidating all my 401ks into one acct with new company.
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Johnny_P wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 10:34 am
SAWCE wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 10:10 am

I thought Lisa was firmly rooted on staying in Philly? Doesn’t that make Wilmington a non-issue?
We are not firmly rooted here at all. There are benefits to staying Philly local such as Grandparents. But Wilmington isn’t far. A move now would be extra complicated though.
Ah, I must have been confusing you with someone else. I thought you’d entertained the idea of moving before but it was always shut down by her.

I don’t know east coast geography at all, so no idea how close Wilmington is to Philly.
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Johnny_P wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 9:32 am I countered for slightly higher. Results pending but I’ll accept it either way.

Cash flow sheet looks kind of ugly. Basically can’t afford to own 2 cars on this salary unless they’re both complete shitkickers. Funny how that works, you go from being able to afford whatever you want, to you have to drive a beat up old hybrid to make ends meet on a salary greater than juan hunnit. I mean all my extra cash will have to go to college funds.

I have no idea how people that make $10/hr get by.

It’s hard telling myself this was the right call. When I know I could have got an additional $20k/yr salary at the chemical plant, which would have required a move to Wilmington Delaware which is cheaper to live than Philly. Our house would have sold quick for high dollar and I could have bought something down there for pennies with a yard and more room.

Sigh. Too late now. We will see how this goes.
Unpopular opinion: college funds mean that you don't end up getting any financial aid and those who are poorly prepared are rewarded for it at the end of the day. Also, it encourages kids to pursue dumb private institutions when State Schools are better. Also, I think I am better for having paid for some of my education and expecting it to be 100% parent funded is crazy. That said, I am very appreciative of the help my parents did provide with this.
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Johnny_P wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 9:37 am
Tarspin wrote: Sun Sep 20, 2020 11:21 am Finally got my year end corporate book keeping done and sent out to my accountant. This year has been extra hard to get any shit around the house done especially book keeping with the kiddies around a lot more, my only real gripe with the self-employment piece otherwise I couldn't ask for a better setup.

Wife works for government, but she continues to battle to keep contract positions in higher up rolls. She just won another competition (third one so far over three years) for a six month contract to do Program Analyst work which keeps her out of Employment Services/front line job which unfortunately will get shut down entirely next year as the government decided that the employment training and management portion should get outsourced to a private agency. They've actually piloted this last year and the agencies have all failed since the clients being sent to them deal with barriers that are out of most recruiters comfort level... like alcoholism, or homelessness, or schizophrenia etc. I shake my head at that move since they already have tried and failed to address these core flaws, her department specializes in rebuilding the lives of broken people, its not just a resume update. All of the people working in Employment Services are getting dumped back into core roles such as the Case Worker and will be displacing those with lower seniority. Worse then that, the Case Workers will all eventually be laid off and the government will issue benefits directly to those requesting them, no screening or accountability.

Next in line for gov spending in a big way is housing, the feds are going to pump huge infrastructure projects into major cities to get people off the streets and housed. I think this is a pretty need idea, just hope it actually works. I can see how getting someone housed is the first and best step towards self-care and financial independence from the system ultimately. :popcorn: on these updated gov services Canada side.

And they say that gov is the place to be for work, maybe only as a politician but definitely glad I lean on my own network and talents at a crazy time like this. We are really lucky to have a ying-yang type careers because it helps with the ups and downs of different cycles like this one. I'm genuinely sad for us as a society, it is such a rat race and financial burden to just live and eat. :sad:
Crazy times. I know a lot of .gov workers in philly that got laid off. Funds are gone. So a lot of these good outreach programs are bankrupt and defunded to pay for whatever else is more important like militarized police equipment or misconduct lawsuits.

How does your wife like the program analyst position? How did she get into that? (If too complex or personal an answer happy to email back and forth with you). I’d love a position like that in DC.
She loves it, there is a little extra time put in outside of work hours when a series of work hit the pipeline but it is engaging and rewarding. She will have to keep competing for the role against other employees - Union rules. It is a lot of report writing and spreadsheet work from what I can tell and in some cases she has been involved in rolling out pilot projects and seeing them through. There are occasional training and facilitation responsibilities which she finds stressful because she is kind of introvert by nature.

She graduated with a Bachelors of Sociology and Psychology but says that new hires are expected to at least have Masters degree. Her friend got her into a Case Worker role in Toronto Board like 15 yrs ago after she graduated, basically put in a good work and scanned for internal and external postings. Within the first few years she transferred to the region of Peel which is slightly west of Toronto and where we lived up until last year when we moved again. She switched from Case Worker to Employment Services and became really good at it.

They have occasional positions that open up and usually are contract, some people compete multiple times before someone with a permanent spot retires or whatever. This latest contract she's in will only hold up for six months, once it expires she will need to compete for it again, resume/written test/interview scored by management and HR. She got feedback on the last competition and she won it handily. The next big .gov spending will be in housing and youth services. The Feds are considering dropping big bucks to acquire hotels/motels and turn them into permanent residences. Government here is going to try and get everyone off the streets. :popcorn:
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Yeah I don’t plan on fully funding my future children’s education. I’m also not going to be preaching college as the end all be all after high school. Military, trade school, etc will all be talked about with equal importance as a 4 year university.
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Detroit wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 10:21 am
Johnny_P wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 9:32 am I countered for slightly higher. Results pending but I’ll accept it either way.

Cash flow sheet looks kind of ugly. Basically can’t afford to own 2 cars on this salary unless they’re both complete shitkickers. Funny how that works, you go from being able to afford whatever you want, to you have to drive a beat up old hybrid to make ends meet on a salary greater than juan hunnit. I mean all my extra cash will have to go to college funds.

I have no idea how people that make $10/hr get by.

It’s hard telling myself this was the right call. When I know I could have got an additional $20k/yr salary at the chemical plant, which would have required a move to Wilmington Delaware which is cheaper to live than Philly. Our house would have sold quick for high dollar and I could have bought something down there for pennies with a yard and more room.

Sigh. Too late now. We will see how this goes.
I honestly don't see how people get by either...I guess that's how people end up with a bunch of debt and no savings because life is expensive.

I know the feels of no longer being able to afford a lifestyle. It's a big reason why we're moving, but hard to accept when you're entering your "prime earning years".
Oh well, at this point it's just best to focus on the positives. You've got a growing family, a wife you love in a city you love. Material things can come and go, but those core things can't. Steady income to provide the essentials is better than nothing.
They don't. They drive beaters, not two brand new Jeeps. They have no savings. They have no insurance. They have no real estate. They have no retirement plans. They share space with others to get by. They exist.
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Johnny_P wrote: Thu Feb 09, 2023 3:21 pm Earn it and burn it, Val.
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SAWCE wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 12:13 pm Yeah I don’t plan on fully funding my future children’s education. I’m also not going to be preaching college as the end all be all after high school. Military, trade school, etc will all be talked about with equal importance as a 4 year university.
Totally depends on the kid. Gonna catch flak for this but if saving the amount required for a state university education cramps your lifestyle, maybe you shouldn't breed in the first place? It is pretty easy to do in 18 years. And then if your kid turns out to be a plumber, pay for trade school, give him $50K for a down payment on a house, and keep the rest.
Detroit wrote:Buy 911s instead of diamonds.
Johnny_P wrote: Thu Feb 09, 2023 3:21 pm Earn it and burn it, Val.
max225 wrote: Mon May 01, 2023 5:35 pm Yes it's a cool car. But prepare the lube/sawdust.
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Desertbreh wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 12:42 pm
SAWCE wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 12:13 pm Yeah I don’t plan on fully funding my future children’s education. I’m also not going to be preaching college as the end all be all after high school. Military, trade school, etc will all be talked about with equal importance as a 4 year university.
Totally depends on the kid. Gonna catch flak for this but if saving the amount required for a state university education cramps your lifestyle, maybe you shouldn't breed in the first place? It is pretty easy to do in 18 years. And then if your kid turns out to be a plumber, pay for trade school, give him $50K for a down payment on a house, and keep the rest.
Makes sense. Like you said, depends on the kid though. I know a lot of people who had their schooling paid for by mommy and daddy and gave zero fucks about passing classes or even graduating. Some actually did end up dropping out 3-4 years in... on the other hand, the people who I know that paid for their own school or busted ass to get scholarships took it much more seriously and had a much higher graduation rate.

I’ll set money aside for my kid’s schooling for sure, but paying for all of it :notsure: ... I think there is some value in having them pay for a portion. I can’t imagine the rage I’d have of funding four years of higher education to have the little shit decide they don’t care enough to finish and then all of that money is completely wasted. You have zero recourse in that scenario.
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SAWCE wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 12:47 pm
Desertbreh wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 12:42 pm

Totally depends on the kid. Gonna catch flak for this but if saving the amount required for a state university education cramps your lifestyle, maybe you shouldn't breed in the first place? It is pretty easy to do in 18 years. And then if your kid turns out to be a plumber, pay for trade school, give him $50K for a down payment on a house, and keep the rest.
Makes sense. Like you said, depends on the kid though. I know a lot of people who had their schooling paid for by mommy and daddy and gave zero fucks about passing classes or even graduating. Some actually did end up dropping out 3-4 years in... on the other hand, the people who I know that paid for their own school or busted ass to get scholarships took it much more seriously and had a much higher graduation rate.

I’ll set money aside for my kid’s schooling for sure, but paying for all of it :notsure: ... I think there is some value in having them pay for a portion. I can’t imagine the rage I’d have of funding four years of higher education to have the little shit decide they don’t care enough to finish and then all of that money is completely wasted. You have zero recourse in that scenario.
Depends on the kid and oh yeah, I'm not suggesting you have an obligation to fund some slacker kid's education. The days of "the college experience" have long since past, that shit is esspensive. Join the Peace Corps. Join the Marine Corps. When you're ready to kick ass or do your damndest, you have the money. If not, you buy a boat. :math:
Detroit wrote:Buy 911s instead of diamonds.
Johnny_P wrote: Thu Feb 09, 2023 3:21 pm Earn it and burn it, Val.
max225 wrote: Mon May 01, 2023 5:35 pm Yes it's a cool car. But prepare the lube/sawdust.
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Desertbreh wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 12:52 pm
SAWCE wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 12:47 pm

Makes sense. Like you said, depends on the kid though. I know a lot of people who had their schooling paid for by mommy and daddy and gave zero fucks about passing classes or even graduating. Some actually did end up dropping out 3-4 years in... on the other hand, the people who I know that paid for their own school or busted ass to get scholarships took it much more seriously and had a much higher graduation rate.

I’ll set money aside for my kid’s schooling for sure, but paying for all of it :notsure: ... I think there is some value in having them pay for a portion. I can’t imagine the rage I’d have of funding four years of higher education to have the little shit decide they don’t care enough to finish and then all of that money is completely wasted. You have zero recourse in that scenario.
Depends on the kid and oh yeah, I'm not suggesting you have an obligation to fund some slacker kid's education. The days of "the college experience" have long since past, that shit is esspensive. Join the Peace Corps. Join the Marine Corps. When you're ready to kick ass or do your damndest, you have the money. If not, you buy a boat. :math:
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Somewhat related to paying for your kid to drop out of college:

There’s an older guy at my gym that is gay and had been funding some younger dude’s education out here at SDSU, USD, or whichever college for the last four years as the guy’s sugar daddy... I don’t know all the details, but apparently they were fully “in a relationship”, older dude thought they were going to stay together and get married after the younger guy graduated. Graduation rolls around this spring, kid gets his diploma, then just fucking dips and moves out without saying a word leaving older dude heartbroken and with a much lighter wallet.

Fucking sucks to be that guy. Highly doubt they had anything contractual in writing to legally protect him from this happening.
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SAWCE wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 1:26 pm Somewhat related to paying for your kid to drop out of college:

There’s an older guy at my gym that is gay and had been funding some younger dude’s education out here at SDSU, USD, or whichever college for the last four years as the guy’s sugar daddy... I don’t know all the details, but apparently they were fully “in a relationship”, older dude thought they were going to stay together and get married after the younger guy graduated. Graduation rolls around this spring, kid gets his diploma, then just fucking dips and moves out without saying a word leaving older dude heartbroken and with a much lighter wallet.

Fucking sucks to be that guy. Highly doubt they had anything contractual in writing to legally protect him from this happening.
Gay dudes do the SD/SB thing a lot but it crosses lots of boundaries and starts looking like the real deal. Then its not. No matter what, man or woman, gay or straight.............if you are a lot older than your "partner" and you have the $$$$$, don't delude yourself, EVER, that you are just that amazing, that the other person is "just into older guys" or that true love "crosses all boundaries"..................NOPE. The kid is in it for the money, and you are in it for the vanity of a trophy X, and because you're just too cool to schtoop somebody your own age. That's it. No exceptions.
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SAWCE wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 12:47 pm
Desertbreh wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 12:42 pm

Totally depends on the kid. Gonna catch flak for this but if saving the amount required for a state university education cramps your lifestyle, maybe you shouldn't breed in the first place? It is pretty easy to do in 18 years. And then if your kid turns out to be a plumber, pay for trade school, give him $50K for a down payment on a house, and keep the rest.
Makes sense. Like you said, depends on the kid though. I know a lot of people who had their schooling paid for by mommy and daddy and gave zero fucks about passing classes or even graduating. Some actually did end up dropping out 3-4 years in... on the other hand, the people who I know that paid for their own school or busted ass to get scholarships took it much more seriously and had a much higher graduation rate.

I’ll set money aside for my kid’s schooling for sure, but paying for all of it :notsure: ... I think there is some value in having them pay for a portion. I can’t imagine the rage I’d have of funding four years of higher education to have the little shit decide they don’t care enough to finish and then all of that money is completely wasted. You have zero recourse in that scenario.
:dat:
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Desertbreh wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 1:37 pm
SAWCE wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 1:26 pm Somewhat related to paying for your kid to drop out of college:

There’s an older guy at my gym that is gay and had been funding some younger dude’s education out here at SDSU, USD, or whichever college for the last four years as the guy’s sugar daddy... I don’t know all the details, but apparently they were fully “in a relationship”, older dude thought they were going to stay together and get married after the younger guy graduated. Graduation rolls around this spring, kid gets his diploma, then just fucking dips and moves out without saying a word leaving older dude heartbroken and with a much lighter wallet.

Fucking sucks to be that guy. Highly doubt they had anything contractual in writing to legally protect him from this happening.
Gay dudes do the SD/SB thing a lot but it crosses lots of boundaries and starts looking like the real deal. Then its not. No matter what, man or woman, gay or straight.............if you are a lot older than your "partner" and you have the $$$$$, don't delude yourself, EVER, that you are just that amazing, that the other person is "just into older guys" or that true love "crosses all boundaries"..................NOPE. The kid is in it for the money, and you are in it for the vanity of a trophy X, and because you're just too cool to schtoop somebody your own age. That's it. No exceptions.
:notwrong:

My last gf prior to ultimately ending up with my now wife, was 7 years older than me. Not a huge gap, but enough, that deep down I knew I'd never really be in it for the long haul. I wasn't exactly in it for the money, more like she was fun to be around/party with and :dock: but at the end of the day, I wasn't really down with the fact that she was aging pretty quickly and I'd rather not :dealwithit: long term with the age gap. Not my best moment to stay with her for 1 year + but :ohwell:
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D Griff wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 1:50 pm
Desertbreh wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 1:37 pm

Gay dudes do the SD/SB thing a lot but it crosses lots of boundaries and starts looking like the real deal. Then its not. No matter what, man or woman, gay or straight.............if you are a lot older than your "partner" and you have the $$$$$, don't delude yourself, EVER, that you are just that amazing, that the other person is "just into older guys" or that true love "crosses all boundaries"..................NOPE. The kid is in it for the money, and you are in it for the vanity of a trophy X, and because you're just too cool to schtoop somebody your own age. That's it. No exceptions.
:notwrong:

My last gf prior to ultimately ending up with my now wife, was 7 years older than me. Not a huge gap, but enough, that deep down I knew I'd never really be in it for the long haul. I wasn't exactly in it for the money, more like she was fun to be around/party with and :dock: but at the end of the day, I wasn't really down with the fact that she was aging pretty quickly and I'd rather not :dealwithit: long term with the age gap. Not my best moment to stay with her for 1 year + but :ohwell:
She knew what she was doing.
Detroit wrote:Buy 911s instead of diamonds.
Johnny_P wrote: Thu Feb 09, 2023 3:21 pm Earn it and burn it, Val.
max225 wrote: Mon May 01, 2023 5:35 pm Yes it's a cool car. But prepare the lube/sawdust.
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Desertbreh wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 1:37 pm
SAWCE wrote: Wed Sep 23, 2020 1:26 pm Somewhat related to paying for your kid to drop out of college:

There’s an older guy at my gym that is gay and had been funding some younger dude’s education out here at SDSU, USD, or whichever college for the last four years as the guy’s sugar daddy... I don’t know all the details, but apparently they were fully “in a relationship”, older dude thought they were going to stay together and get married after the younger guy graduated. Graduation rolls around this spring, kid gets his diploma, then just fucking dips and moves out without saying a word leaving older dude heartbroken and with a much lighter wallet.

Fucking sucks to be that guy. Highly doubt they had anything contractual in writing to legally protect him from this happening.
Gay dudes do the SD/SB thing a lot but it crosses lots of boundaries and starts looking like the real deal. Then its not. No matter what, man or woman, gay or straight.............if you are a lot older than your "partner" and you have the $$$$$, don't delude yourself, EVER, that you are just that amazing, that the other person is "just into older guys" or that true love "crosses all boundaries"..................NOPE. The kid is in it for the money, and you are in it for the vanity of a trophy X, and because you're just too cool to schtoop somebody your own age. That's it. No exceptions.
My dad claims to only be attracted to people significantly younger than him...in fact younger than me at 35. He enjoys the sugar daddy thing, but legit wants a relationship out of these dudes that have no interest in that for all the other reasons stated.

It's weird...I find that I'm naturally attracted to people my age, even as I get older, I look at other 35 y/o's with :notbad: when younger chicks can be not my thing in many cases. I kind of assumed that was the norm, but then my dad's situation emerged and made me realize how hard it could be for some people. I guess you can't really control what/who you're attracted to.
Desertbreh wrote: Tue Oct 10, 2017 6:40 pm My guess would be that Chris took some time off because he has read the dialogue on this page 1,345 times and decided to spend some of his free time doing something besides beating a horse to death.
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