OT 15: New Year, New Poo

Off-topic? You mean on-topic!
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Johnny_P wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 7:20 am You guys ever wonder what the hell you're doing with your lives? Yes, nearly every week Like, what's the point, what's your purpose? Is there a purpose? Life is nothing short of a miracle, it doesn't make sense that a string of proteins would tell a handful of molecules how to arrange themselves to develop into a conscious being. And we live our lives for however long until our time runs out, and the world carries on. And when you die, that might as well be the end of the universe from your perspective, because although the world carries on your consciousness won't.

Religion doesn't make sense either. However the more I learn about the world, the cosmos, and the absolutely insane number of "just right" conditions our planet meets, the more I wonder how in the hell could it all have been by chance. That's a HELL of a dice roll. So if there was some guiding force of creation, is there a guiding force after life? You are a pretty smart guy. Intelligence can be a curse as much as blessing. If you were a window licker, you would not be struggling or even bothering to contemplate these topics. Hell, a large part of human history has been spent on trying to understand these very same topics. You will have to find your own answer. I wouldn't say religion is for a "weak mind" but it certainly originated to help bring peace to the masses of people looking for answers. You can certainly have faith/trust in a higher power without being involved in a specific church or religion. What's to say that people are the only ones that can enter this? My cat and dog have individual thought, individual reason. They aren't that different from me. I'm sure they think about me when I'm not home, and I know they dream. What happens to them? Cats and dogs dont have the same brain capabilities as humans. Most of there bonds and loyalty revolves around a mutual need for food/care. That's why they are great companions. They are simpler.

It's a terrifying thought to think that when your life is over, it's just the end, lights out, no more. I have been knocked out a few times in my life, and you may remember events leading up to it, but then it's ZERO memory for however long you were out. Your life restarted. What happens when it doesn't restart? have you had a traumatic lose in your life?

I didn't get any sleep last night and my stomach is so turned over today that I feel nauseous. I actually think I might be in mild shock. :sad:

I doubt its shock, you need to take some personal days. This is why people camp. There is a serious need to unplug and calm down. You have wound yourself up pretty tight with years of going through the motions. You need to find that release.

Is this a mid-life crisis?

probably not, but you might experience a similar "hump" later in life.
Replying above:

In general, I'm no clinician but I am married to one. You should def seek out some professional help with the major concepts you are grappling with.
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Johnny_P wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:29 am
Melon wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 8:52 am Welp, this is all we got my man.

All you can do is the next right thing, and something that would help you would be some volunteering, helping others is always a way to boost the good feels. Happiness isn't some big event, it's a thousand tiny ones. Look for the small things you enjoy and make them a part of your daily, or weekly habits. I have to force myself to do things that I know I'll enjoy, because naturally I'll want to sit on my ass, that's part of my battle with depression. Your going to have to fight your own battle with your own weapons.

Truth be told, people have offered life advice to you several times on here and you never seem to take it.
Your job and your relationship seem to to taxing you beyond what you're able to provide.
Not going to harp on it, but that's just an outsiders opinion.
I need to find a new job. This one is killing me literally.
It seems to be a large portion of stress in your life. You obviously have some money saved and live far in your means. You aren't a debt slave. You need to give notice of leave for your sanity.
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Johnny_P wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:28 am Not sure what Lisa has to do with this. She’s showing me what can be done if you dedicate your life to something real. She helped me out immensely yesterday.
Well that's good. Dedication is one thing but you gotta live too.
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Yeah I might set something up with my therapist if this doesn’t pass in a day or two.
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Big Brain Bradley wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:37 am
Johnny_P wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:28 am Not sure what Lisa has to do with this. She’s showing me what can be done if you dedicate your life to something real. She helped me out immensely yesterday.
Well that's good. Dedication is one thing but you gotta live too.
This work schedule though. Man I can’t do this shit anymore, 12 hour days 6 days a week. I get no sense of achievement from this and instead am just unhappy that I can’t hang out with friends or go for a bike ride or whatever.
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Johnny_P wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:37 am Yeah I might set something up with my therapist if this doesn’t pass in a day or two.
You could always webcam with Mrs. :dubshow:
:hubba:
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Johnny_P wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:37 am Yeah I might set something up with my therapist if this doesn’t pass in a day or two.
Great idea man.

We're rooting for you.
I battle with depression myself, and it begins to manifest itself physically with tiredness and lethargy before I ever feel it emotionally, but it's not easy man.
4zilch wrote: Mon Apr 12, 2021 8:46 am I'm a fucking failure.
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Apex wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:39 am
Johnny_P wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:37 am Yeah I might set something up with my therapist if this doesn’t pass in a day or two.
You could always webcam with Mrs. :dubshow:
:hubba:
she actually has that ability but it isnt ethical to do it with someone not in her licensed state.

she does have very reasonable rates and really helps a variety of people struggling with similar things.
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Johnny_P wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:39 am
Big Brain Bradley wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:37 am

Well that's good. Dedication is one thing but you gotta live too.
This work schedule though. Man I can’t do this shit anymore, 12 hour days 6 days a week. I get no sense of achievement from this and instead am just unhappy that I can’t hang out with friends or go for a bike ride or whatever.
Working yourself to death. Yup, that's a surefire way to unhappiness.
4zilch wrote: Mon Apr 12, 2021 8:46 am I'm a fucking failure.
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Johnny_P wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:39 am
Big Brain Bradley wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:37 am

Well that's good. Dedication is one thing but you gotta live too.
This work schedule though. Man I can’t do this shit anymore, 12 hour days 6 days a week. I get no sense of achievement from this and instead am just unhappy that I can’t hang out with friends or go for a bike ride or whatever.
with no guarantee of money you need to quit that shit. And take a nice winter chill the fuck out week.

i did that shit and only last 6 months. Made a shit ton of money but yeah, not again.
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Melon wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:43 am
Johnny_P wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:39 am

This work schedule though. Man I can’t do this shit anymore, 12 hour days 6 days a week. I get no sense of achievement from this and instead am just unhappy that I can’t hang out with friends or go for a bike ride or whatever.
Working yourself to death. Yup, that's a surefire way to unhappiness.
:dat: x100

re: my mom is 71 and works 7 days a week.
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Johnny_P wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:39 am
Big Brain Bradley wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:37 am

Well that's good. Dedication is one thing but you gotta live too.
This work schedule though. Man I can’t do this shit anymore, 12 hour days 6 days a week. I get no sense of achievement from this and instead am just unhappy that I can’t hang out with friends or go for a bike ride or whatever.
yea dude, i agree thats no way to live.

You should talk to the GF about it RE: your job and future. Then make a decision, and go talk to boss. Whether its more money, less work hours, responsibility, etc... have a come to god moment with them and be like if there is no change im gone. You have the luxury of having money saved and being able to do that.

We have been collectively telling you to do this for a year, but you just continue do the beta-male-bumble and let them walk over you and be miserable.
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dubshow wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:42 am
Apex wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:39 am

You could always webcam with Mrs. :dubshow:
:hubba:
she actually has that ability but it isnt ethical to do it with someone not in her licensed state.

she does have very reasonable rates and really helps a variety of people struggling with similar things.
I did not know her license was state specific.
I just recalled you saying she could do the webex thing a few months back, when she started her own practice I think?
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Apex wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:45 am
dubshow wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:42 am

she actually has that ability but it isnt ethical to do it with someone not in her licensed state.

she does have very reasonable rates and really helps a variety of people struggling with similar things.
I did not know her license was state specific.
I just recalled you saying she could do the webex thing a few months back, when she started her own practice I think?
yeah, id have to ask. All licensing is state specific.
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dubshow wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:44 am
Melon wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:43 am

Working yourself to death. Yup, that's a surefire way to unhappiness.
:dat: x100

re: my mom is 71 and works 7 days a week.
She has enough blood pressure to run a skid steer .
4zilch wrote: Mon Apr 12, 2021 8:46 am I'm a fucking failure.
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Melon wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:54 am
dubshow wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:44 am

:dat: x100

re: my mom is 71 and works 7 days a week.
She has enough blood pressure to run a skid steer .
:impressive:
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Melon wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:54 am
dubshow wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:44 am

:dat: x100

re: my mom is 71 and works 7 days a week.
She has enough blood pressure to run a skid steer .
Can you add a PTO to a human? Its free energy at those levels.
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SAWCE wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 10:34 am Image
:lolol:
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SAWCE wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 10:34 am Image
:notwrong:
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Johnny_P wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:39 am This work schedule though. Man I can’t do this shit anymore, 12 hour days 6 days a week. I get no sense of achievement from this and instead am just unhappy that I can’t hang out with friends or go for a bike ride or whatever.
Ugh. Yeah that's no way to keep yourself happy. There's no amount of money that will allow you to enjoy yourself outside of work if you're working that much.

My wife was offered a director level gig and another company that would probably come close to doubling her salary. She works for what was a startup and is still probably underpaid for what she does due to the size of the company, but they're flexible, value her experience tremendously, and have a great culture. The other company is Chicago-based, totally corporate and cutthroat, and expects those kinds of 12 hour days for weeks on end.

We decided without much deliberation that no amount of money would make that move worthwhile, especially with a 4.5 month old at home. Sounds like you're probably facing down something similar. I dunno man, seems like it might be time to look for other opportunities.
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coogles wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 10:49 am
Johnny_P wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:39 am This work schedule though. Man I can’t do this shit anymore, 12 hour days 6 days a week. I get no sense of achievement from this and instead am just unhappy that I can’t hang out with friends or go for a bike ride or whatever.
Ugh. Yeah that's no way to keep yourself happy. There's no amount of money that will allow you to enjoy yourself outside of work if you're working that much.

My wife was offered a director level gig and another company that would probably come close to doubling her salary. She works for what was a startup and is still probably underpaid for what she does due to the size of the company, but they're flexible, value her experience tremendously, and have a great culture. The other company is Chicago-based, totally corporate and cutthroat, and expects those kinds of 12 hour days for weeks on end.

We decided without much deliberation that no amount of money would make that move worthwhile, especially with a 4.5 month old at home. Sounds like you're probably facing down something similar. I dunno man, seems like it might be time to look for other opportunities.
Good call
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Apex wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 10:40 am
SAWCE wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 10:34 am Image
:lolol:
:bravo:

4k for sure.
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Big Brain Bradley wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:56 am
Melon wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:54 am

She has enough blood pressure to run a skid steer .
Can you add a PTO to a human? Its free energy at those levels.
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Johnny_P wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 10:55 am
coogles wrote: Mon Dec 03, 2018 10:49 am

Ugh. Yeah that's no way to keep yourself happy. There's no amount of money that will allow you to enjoy yourself outside of work if you're working that much.

My wife was offered a director level gig and another company that would probably come close to doubling her salary. She works for what was a startup and is still probably underpaid for what she does due to the size of the company, but they're flexible, value her experience tremendously, and have a great culture. The other company is Chicago-based, totally corporate and cutthroat, and expects those kinds of 12 hour days for weeks on end.

We decided without much deliberation that no amount of money would make that move worthwhile, especially with a 4.5 month old at home. Sounds like you're probably facing down something similar. I dunno man, seems like it might be time to look for other opportunities.
Good call
this would be a good call

https://www.opencounseling.com/hotlines-us
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