:wrong: Soviet car reviews

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max225
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Today’s victim is a 2019 Mercedes GLC 300.
In lovely :eeyore: gray
Rwd
Options list
HIDs
Panoramic roof
Keyless

That’s it... no other option in this bad boy.

Let’s start with the good as it is a much shorter list ;)
1. Car is exceptionally smooth and quiet
2. Johnny approved ride quality absorbs everything without jitters like a Jeep
3. Nice quality inside and out
4. Square bottom wheel because reasons
5. Really nice turning circle
6. Imo one of the if not the best looking “midsize” suv.
7. I’m averaging over 24 mpg which is nuts
8. One of the most comfortable seats ever (passenger) not as adjustable as driver ... which is shit this is not a civic

What’s bad:
1. Driving dynamics:
Steering: terrible and over boosted, its undriveable in comfort. In sport I was steering with 1 finger everywhere
Brakes: they are giant fixed calipers up front but they suffer from the same issue my 335i did, they are just way too soft and spongy initially, 1/4 does nearly nothing.

Engine: gutless wonder that requires premium. If the first issues aren’t enough this one certainly is. It is honestly shit, it drives worse than a civic ... complete lack of torque under 3000 rpm, car attempts to always keep rpms low in any mode but sport, and it causes it to Feel like a Prius, no exhaust note of course. A boring blender at best. And a transmission that hopelessly hunts for even the most meager torque curve. It is also missing 2 gears in sport. Going from 9 to 7. Completely and utterly pathetic. Especially when it starts from 2nd gear in all modes but sport ... wtf: boat anchor dragging feel. Equivalent to towing a 3000lb trailer

Suspension: while it’s nice at absorbing bumps it does nothing else, epic bodyroll, bottoms out over speed bumps if you go a little too fast, I’m sure with 4 people and luggage it would be god damn awful. Squatting like crazy.

2. Infotainment is abysmal, frankly the base system is torture. I am not a person that gives a fuck about these, but it took me a day ! To figure out that CarPlay only works in the second not first usb slot, requires some
Weird mb app, and is almost inoperable because the screen is not a touch screen and the car doesn’t have a back button without the nav system. So you’re just scrolling into oblivion in random menus. and can’t switch music/nav easily etc. you have to talk to Siri to work it :mindblown: you can’t enter an address

3. The base stereo is a joke, in the stock setting it sounds like an iPhone 5 speaker.... after turning bass and trebble to 7/8 out of 10 it got slightly worse than a JL.
:wtf: people

4. Wiper blades work like shit, no slow setting, no auto setting ... just some sort of garbage setting that goes fast or really fast :wtf:

5. This may be a rental car issue but the 18k mile tires wub wub wub on the freeway resonating through the cabin, they are stock Pirellis, with at least 70% thread. Not acceptable

Overall conclusion...
you can’t have the base model period, you need the glc 43 model with options, nearly everything will get addressed. But Jesus is this bad. I would trade this in the same day I got it on a rav 4 adventure which costs 10k less.
Overall 2/7
-2 for engine
-1 for options and lack of CarPlay
-1 shit tires
-1 disconnected drive
+1 for looks great
Apologies for spelling and grammar issues as I’m posting from my phone.
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Last edited by max225 on Thu Dec 12, 2019 1:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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CaleDeRoo
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Dang. Sounds like you should swap it for a JL actually.
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max225
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[user not found] wrote: Sat Dec 07, 2019 9:53 am 300 is what, a 2.0T? What engine is in it?
Yep. 2.slow in a big vehicle 243hp and supposedly 270 tq ... maybe someone filled it up with regular go juice? I topped it off with 92 which btw is 80 cents cheaper than in California. :wtf:

Supposedly 0-60 in 6.3 I have no idea how...
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max225
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CaleDeRoo wrote: Sat Dec 07, 2019 9:02 am Dang. Sounds like you should swap it for a JL actually.
Too much of a hassle.
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Tune it
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max225
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[user not found] wrote: Sat Dec 07, 2019 11:34 am
max225 wrote: Sat Dec 07, 2019 11:24 am

Yep. 2.slow in a big vehicle 243hp and supposedly 270 tq ... maybe someone filled it up with regular go juice? I topped it off with 92 which btw is 80 cents cheaper than in California. :wtf:

Supposedly 0-60 in 6.3 I have no idea how...
Es possible. Regular juice will have the computer pulling timing, thus less power.
This may be the case. After adding 92 it seems less gutless. Still not acceptable for price tag :doe: imo
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max225
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Johnny_P wrote: Sat Dec 07, 2019 8:39 pmTune it
Having Cobb drop shipped to my hotel.

Also it showed a low coolant message this am :thisisfine:
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max225 wrote: Sat Dec 07, 2019 11:16 pm
Johnny_P wrote: Sat Dec 07, 2019 8:39 pmTune it
Having Cobb drop shipped to my hotel.

Also it showed a low coolant message this am :thisisfine:
:doit:

You eat at Mama's ?
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max225
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CorvetteWaxer wrote: Sat Dec 07, 2019 11:41 pm
max225 wrote: Sat Dec 07, 2019 11:16 pm

Having Cobb drop shipped to my hotel.

Also it showed a low coolant message this am :thisisfine:
:doit:

You eat at Mama's ?
Not yet... drove 250 miles today did the entire island ... to Hana, and back, one giant circle. but I’m on keto so food is sorta on the back burner :( but I will check it tomorrow :)
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max225 wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:25 am
CorvetteWaxer wrote: Sat Dec 07, 2019 11:41 pm

:doit:

You eat at Mama's ?
Not yet... drove 250 miles today did the entire island ... to Hana, and back, one giant circle. but I’m on keto so food is sorta on the back burner :( but I will check it tomorrow :)
So since keto, I guess you skipped the best banana bread in the world on the road to Hana?
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max225
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CorvetteWaxer wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:35 am
max225 wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:25 am

Not yet... drove 250 miles today did the entire island ... to Hana, and back, one giant circle. but I’m on keto so food is sorta on the back burner :( but I will check it tomorrow :)
So since keto, I guess you skipped the best banana bread in the world on the road to Hana?
I got the woman Aunty Sandys. Not sure if it’s the best but it smelled damn good and she ate a slice while I cried
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max225 wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:37 am
CorvetteWaxer wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:35 am

So since keto, I guess you skipped the best banana bread in the world on the road to Hana?
I got the woman Aunty Sandys. Not sure if it’s the best but it smelled damn good and she ate a slice while I cried
Yeah, that's the place. We love it and the ladies working there are super nice. Also got some good pics from the rocks on the shoreline right there.
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max225
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CorvetteWaxer wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:41 am
max225 wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:37 am

I got the woman Aunty Sandys. Not sure if it’s the best but it smelled damn good and she ate a slice while I cried
Yeah, that's the place. We love it and the ladies working there are super nice. Also got some good pics from the rocks on the shoreline right there.

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max225 wrote: Sat Dec 07, 2019 11:16 pm
Johnny_P wrote: Sat Dec 07, 2019 8:39 pmTune it
Having Cobb drop shipped to my hotel.

Also it showed a low coolant message this am :thisisfine:
Tap water. :micdrop:
Detroit wrote:Buy 911s instead of diamonds.
Johnny_P wrote: Thu Feb 09, 2023 3:21 pm Earn it and burn it, Val.
max225 wrote: Mon May 01, 2023 5:35 pm Yes it's a cool car. But prepare the lube/sawdust.
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Desertbreh wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:39 pm
max225 wrote: Sat Dec 07, 2019 11:16 pm

Having Cobb drop shipped to my hotel.

Also it showed a low coolant message this am :thisisfine:
Tap water. :micdrop:
Yep
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max225
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Desertbreh wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:39 pm
max225 wrote: Sat Dec 07, 2019 11:16 pm

Having Cobb drop shipped to my hotel.

Also it showed a low coolant message this am :thisisfine:
Tap water. :micdrop:
Better yet ... :aintcare: if it blows it blows. No visible leaks = not my problem
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max225 wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:48 pm
Desertbreh wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:39 pm

Tap water. :micdrop:
Better yet ... :aintcare: if it blows it blows. No visible leaks = not my problem
Those warning messages trigger me
Detroit wrote:Buy 911s instead of diamonds.
Johnny_P wrote: Thu Feb 09, 2023 3:21 pm Earn it and burn it, Val.
max225 wrote: Mon May 01, 2023 5:35 pm Yes it's a cool car. But prepare the lube/sawdust.
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Desertbreh
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max225 wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:48 pm
Desertbreh wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:39 pm

Tap water. :micdrop:
Better yet ... :aintcare: if it blows it blows. No visible leaks = not my problem
It is bad enough to mix with Hawaiian Tap Water and not 50 percent distilled/ 50 percent tears of the Kaiser
Detroit wrote:Buy 911s instead of diamonds.
Johnny_P wrote: Thu Feb 09, 2023 3:21 pm Earn it and burn it, Val.
max225 wrote: Mon May 01, 2023 5:35 pm Yes it's a cool car. But prepare the lube/sawdust.
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max225
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Desertbreh wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:53 pm
max225 wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:48 pm

Better yet ... :aintcare: if it blows it blows. No visible leaks = not my problem
Those warning messages trigger me
Yea a ton of stuff triggers me in this vehicle as well.

Beach sand in trunk
Wub wub tires
Stains on the sides of the seats
That epic CarPlay failure
Missing privacy cover for trunk
6 door dings and scratches all over trunk lid from fucking suit cases into it ...
The warning message on inclines it seems so i haven’t gotten it since.

But yea what do I do ? People are scum obviously can’t treat things right.

This vehicle hasn’t even been on the planet for 12 months
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Desertbreh wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:57 pm
max225 wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:48 pm

Better yet ... :aintcare: if it blows it blows. No visible leaks = not my problem
It is bad enough to mix with Hawaiian Tap Water and not 50 percent distilled/ 50 percent tears of the Kaiser
Car was parked with a side lean as none of the ground is level here overnight.

Also when I opened the coolant Reservoir it bent some plastic tabs on the lid, they literally looked like one one time use tabs. :wtf: that :triggered: me also.

It required so much force an average woman wouldn’t be able to do it. Considering it’s their target demographic ... :disgust:
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max225 wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 1:05 pm
Desertbreh wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 12:57 pm

It is bad enough to mix with Hawaiian Tap Water and not 50 percent distilled/ 50 percent tears of the Kaiser
Car was parked with a side lean as none of the ground is level here overnight.

Also when I opened the coolant Reservoir it bent some plastic tabs on the lid, they literally looked like one one time use tabs. :wtf: that :triggered: me also.

It required so much force an average woman wouldn’t be able to do it. Considering it’s their target demographic ... :disgust:
Brutal
Detroit wrote:Buy 911s instead of diamonds.
Johnny_P wrote: Thu Feb 09, 2023 3:21 pm Earn it and burn it, Val.
max225 wrote: Mon May 01, 2023 5:35 pm Yes it's a cool car. But prepare the lube/sawdust.
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I'm surprised that german cars even have hoods that can be opened by the "owner" (renter) anymore. No user serviceable parts inside.
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troyguitar wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 2:07 pm I'm surprised that german cars even have hoods that can be opened by the "owner" (renter) anymore. No user serviceable parts inside.
It's in there, you just have to dig.

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CorvetteWaxer wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 2:48 pm
troyguitar wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 2:07 pm I'm surprised that german cars even have hoods that can be opened by the "owner" (renter) anymore. No user serviceable parts inside.
It's in there, you just have to dig.

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How to add coolant

Step 1: remove tail lights
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CorvetteWaxer
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Johnny_P wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 6:28 pm
CorvetteWaxer wrote: Sun Dec 08, 2019 2:48 pm

It's in there, you just have to dig.

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How to add coolant

Step 1: remove tail lights
LOL

Nah, you can do that just by removing the fans and air intake. Gotta remove the lights to get the spoiler off to get to the ECU and also need to remove the lights to remove the rear bumper to get to the air filters.

Makes perfect sense.
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