McQueenBalls Whacks it to his Douchemobile and other Musings

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Damn dude. Well I'm glad you're alright and have that life lesson learned without facing any real consequences. I can't imagine I would have been able to keep my cool in that situation.
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razr390 wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 7:33 am Hi McQueen. Nice story. Don’t that shit again. you don’t have any sympathy from me for drunk driving. Those CHP guys were your guardian angels, because I’m sure your pucker factor sobered you up quickly and them pulling you over could’ve prevented you from wrapping your shit around a tree or running a red light in an intersection, not only fucking your life up but possibly many others’

So, again, lucky man, but you won’t garner much sympathy with this sort of behavior here.
I don’t think he asked for sympathy.. he said he knew what he did was stupid and not something he’d normally do.
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Fuuuuuuuck, dood. Sounds like you learned your lesson and realize the gift you were given, George Bailey-style. Don't squander it.

Oh, and re-read Zil's post for extra karma infusion.
:wap: Where are these mangos?
Detroit wrote: Fri Apr 16, 2021 1:19 pm I don't understand anything anymore.
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McQueenBalls wrote: Tue Nov 12, 2019 10:11 pm
coogles wrote: Tue Nov 12, 2019 10:56 am If she so much as has the Snapchat app installed on her phone that’s a :nope: from me, dawg. So damn thankful I don’t have to put up with the shit it requires to date now. :wap:
Yeah dude, its a bummer. It depresses me on the regular until I have to keep reminding myself that the heyday portion of my relationship with my still/ex wife is/was long past and that I was fairly miserable the last 2-3 years of our marriage as well so thats no good either. Theres really something to be said for the sheer fucking work that goes into this though and what is required and the energy and there is nothing better than having a cool, hot GF that you live with that you are fully down to just hang with and you're getting laid on the regular and all that. Desert brah gives me hope for 2nd times around because currently I'm getting pretty burnt and I've only been on the scene for less than a year really. Hustling the poon game is a young man's game, period. And then you think of all the mundane conversation and all that is required and goes along with that when you could just go home, jerk off and put away a few cold ones while you stoke out on some rad documentary.
More guys should do this, lol. Life, unfortunately, is a series of compromises unless you are George Clooney, eg impossibly rich, charming and good looking. Even he got married, though I am unsure why. Once you start veering out of the twenty something poonslayer game (fun, yet not sustainable) you start running into problems that are EXACERBATED by crotchfruit, BIG TIME.

1. Single women with kids, and they are LEGION. Do you really want to take on the responsibility of helping to raise additional crotchfruit that you didn't lay the foundations for? There are a LOT of terrible parents out there producing terrible cf, and I want no part of that. Ill mannered cf? Would rather jerk and watch rad documentary.
2. Single, CHILDLESS, hot women who make bank? Nine times out of ten they may want to bang but they are not interested in YOUR crotchfruit. Childless for a reason. Don't need to put up with your need to breed. And you, of course, are not interested in a LTR with a woman who basically has no interest in your kids.
3. These 20 something instagrammers? Uh, if you make it past San Diego, at some point, 9 times out of ten, if things get serious, they are going to want to pump out additional cf with YOU. Run, Forrest, Run.

There are no easy answers. I do thank you for your contributions, the domestic pinshitting home improvement scene needed some spice. 5/7 would rather read about poonslayer.com than Zil digging holes in the frozen tundra.
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Johnny_P wrote: Thu Feb 09, 2023 3:21 pm Earn it and burn it, Val.
max225 wrote: Mon May 01, 2023 5:35 pm Yes it's a cool car. But prepare the lube/sawdust.
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razr390 wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 7:33 am Hi McQueen. Nice story. Don’t that shit again. you don’t have any sympathy from me for drunk driving. Those CHP guys were your guardian angels, because I’m sure your pucker factor sobered you up quickly and them pulling you over could’ve prevented you from wrapping your shit around a tree or running a red light in an intersection, not only fucking your life up but possibly many others’

So, again, lucky man, but you won’t garner much sympathy with this sort of behavior here.
Eh, he had the balls to share a story about being a royal fuckup and getting away with it, that one one time. Its good content, and I'll allow it.
Detroit wrote:Buy 911s instead of diamonds.
Johnny_P wrote: Thu Feb 09, 2023 3:21 pm Earn it and burn it, Val.
max225 wrote: Mon May 01, 2023 5:35 pm Yes it's a cool car. But prepare the lube/sawdust.
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McQueenBalls wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 12:49 am Gentlemen, I am a lucky lucky man and had a ridiculously close call to total peril last night.

Went to a going away party for this girl from work, everyone went, some bar in Silverlake, probably put away 3 beers and 2 vodka sodas. Not C minus either, but these lame hoppy hipsters beers people all drink and pretend to like now. High alcohol content shit beers because this place was too special to have Olympia or Miller or something. So I'm pretty tossed and I'm flirting with the white rabbit and she's pretending after the fact that I could have gone home with her and I'm hanging out with my perpetually hot assistant and some other people and I'm drunk and frustrated and... and I usually Uber or whatever but for whatever reason last night I decided to be a big fucking idiot and just finish my 5th drink, get in the car and drive home.

So its about 12:30am and I'm on the 210 east, close to the exit to my house, literally no one on the highway. Theres a downhill onramp that connects with a right lane that ends in a turn lane which forces you to merge. I'm going along about 80mph and I see headlights of an SUV barreling down the onramp and I'm thinking its some guy who is going to try and beat me to the merge. So what do I do but gun it and I'm pretty instantly doing about 105mph and

boom... the lights go on.

I thought "This is it. my number is up, my life as I know it is over, I'm gonna get a DUI."

This was CHP and they came in hot. Megaphone, spotlight, directing me where to pull over etc. I exit the freeway and pull over. My mind is racing and I have a pack of listerine breath strips in my pocket and shove some of those in my mouth, I open all my windows , get out my licence and reg, put my hands on the wheel and sit there. 2 of them come up on me, one on either side of the car, guy on the passenger side is shining the flashlight in my face and around the car and the guy on my left says angrily "do you have any idea how fast you were going back there?"

Me: "Yes, about 100."
Him: I clocked you at 103! What were you doing?!
Me: "I saw headlights coming fast down the onramp and thought someone was going to try and beat me to the merge so I gunned it. Its a fast car."
Him: Do you know how many people like you we peel off the side of the road in the middle of the night?

Then he takes my papers and they go back to the car. The whole time I am TRIPPING FUCKING BALLS. I was tossed. Well lubed. would have blown way over. I am thinking there is no fucking way they don't smell booze, this is what these guys live for. I am sure they are going to come back and ask me to get out of the car, the whole routine. So after what seemed like a half hour they come back, the officer just stands there shining the light in my face and then he says "alright, I'm citing you for speeding but just for exceeding 65, I could get you for reckless driving at that speed but I'm not going to do that. Do you understand? Will you sign here."

My heart is beating out of my chest and I'm playing it cool and I want to like hug this guy because I dont even know what is happening and that was it. I was off the hook. I made it. How the fuck I did I have no idea. God, jesus, dead grandma, guardian angel, luck, who knows but I made it. It was ironic because this LAPD buddy of mine we hire for shows as an off duty officer was there at the party and we were just talking about DUI's and how brutal it is out there, how easy it is to get one and how ruthless cops are with that. So I called him this morning and told him the story and he said "Dude that is your one get of jail free card, you won't get another. Maybe those guys felt bad for you, or saw you had no priors and saw the child carseats in the back or just didn't want to deal with processing you and all that or maybe they respected you were straight with them and you didn't seem impaired but you should NOT have gotten a pass for that." He then said he was watching me at the party and he's like "what do you weigh, a buck 50? you would have blown double over the limit".

So there it is.. Big come to jesus moment as they say. I'm usually pretty good about drinking and driving but it just takes that one time. BUt just overall, it made me think about how close to the edge I have always played things, how much I have to lose, put a lot of things into perspective. I'm just really fucking lucky and I am like, vowing to not drink and drive again. Just like, $50 Uber ride, whatever it takes, but I can't do that again. No reason why I shouldnt be absolutely FUCKED today but here I am. So lucky. Gratitude to the universe gentlemen, gratitude.
Epic story...

That said, I would say to be safe than sorry is to not go over the limit even after 1 drink. Not worth the hassle and increased liability.

“This car is fast” :lol: I’m sure they let you go not because of your honesty etc, combo of factors. They knew you were Anus puckering etc, and they decided to have a nice moment and let you go on your way and focus on the plight that is policing illegals in la.

I have a few stories from my ride alongs there...
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SAWCE wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 10:00 am
razr390 wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 7:33 am Hi McQueen. Nice story. Don’t that shit again. you don’t have any sympathy from me for drunk driving. Those CHP guys were your guardian angels, because I’m sure your pucker factor sobered you up quickly and them pulling you over could’ve prevented you from wrapping your shit around a tree or running a red light in an intersection, not only fucking your life up but possibly many others’

So, again, lucky man, but you won’t garner much sympathy with this sort of behavior here.
I don’t think he asked for sympathy.. he said he knew what he did was stupid and not something he’d normally do.
I didn't, at all. I realize it was stupid, that I am beyond lucky and will not do it again. But if theres anyone on this forum who hasn't driven drunk before, raise your hand and I'll paypal you $50.

I didn't think so.
wap wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 12:20 pm Fuuuuuuuck, dood. Sounds like you learned your lesson and realize the gift you were given, George Bailey-style. Don't squander it.

Oh, and re-read Zil's post for extra karma infusion.
Hahaha, total wonderful life scenario. I will not squander it sir. I have a date with this girl next thursday night, we are meeting at a bar and I am already strategizing my Uber scenario. Never again.
Desertbreh wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 12:42 pm
Eh, he had the balls to share a story about being a royal fuckup and getting away with it, that one one time. Its good content, and I'll allow it.
Preciate you brah.
Everything you say about dating post separation, my age, breaking the women down into categories is so spot on.. no wait. I'll quote that too and comment on each point in bold. so spot on.
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McQueenBalls wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 9:15 pm
SAWCE wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 10:00 am

I don’t think he asked for sympathy.. he said he knew what he did was stupid and not something he’d normally do.
I didn't, at all. I realize it was stupid, that I am beyond lucky and will not do it again. But if theres anyone on this forum who hasn't driven drunk before, raise your hand and I'll paypal you $50.

I didn't think so.
wap wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 12:20 pm Fuuuuuuuck, dood. Sounds like you learned your lesson and realize the gift you were given, George Bailey-style. Don't squander it.

Oh, and re-read Zil's post for extra karma infusion.
Hahaha, total wonderful life scenario. I will not squander it sir. I have a date with this girl next thursday night, we are meeting at a bar and I am already strategizing my Uber scenario. Never again.
There is always one breh, be careful.
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McQueenBalls wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 9:15 pm
SAWCE wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 10:00 am

I don’t think he asked for sympathy.. he said he knew what he did was stupid and not something he’d normally do.
I didn't, at all. I realize it was stupid, that I am beyond lucky and will not do it again. But if theres anyone on this forum who hasn't driven drunk before, raise your hand and I'll paypal you $50.

I didn't think so.
wap wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 12:20 pm Fuuuuuuuck, dood. Sounds like you learned your lesson and realize the gift you were given, George Bailey-style. Don't squander it.

Oh, and re-read Zil's post for extra karma infusion.
Hahaha, total wonderful life scenario. I will not squander it sir. I have a date with this girl next thursday night, we are meeting at a bar and I am already strategizing my Uber scenario. Never again.
:like:
:wap: Where are these mangos?
Detroit wrote: Fri Apr 16, 2021 1:19 pm I don't understand anything anymore.
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Desertbreh wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 12:35 pm

More guys should do this, lol. Life, unfortunately, is a series of compromises unless you are George Clooney, eg impossibly rich, charming and good looking. Even he got married, though I am unsure why. Once you start veering out of the twenty something poonslayer game (fun, yet not sustainable) you start running into problems that are EXACERBATED by crotchfruit, BIG TIME.

1. Single women with kids, and they are LEGION. Do you really want to take on the responsibility of helping to raise additional crotchfruit that you didn't lay the foundations for? There are a LOT of terrible parents out there producing terrible cf, and I want no part of that. Ill mannered cf? Would rather jerk and watch rad documentary. Agreed. I don't want to take that on, no. I'm in a tough spot for sure. I did go on a date with a woman yesterday who has 1 kid though who was cool, has a 50/50 scene, makes good money and we have a date next week. I'm just looking for steady bone zone honestly and I think that within the legions of single moms, there are semi-hot moms that are looking for boneage and not some brady bunch scene, which I have less than zero interest in.
2. Single, CHILDLESS, hot women who make bank? Nine times out of ten they may want to bang but they are not interested in YOUR crotchfruit. Childless for a reason. Don't need to put up with your need to breed. And you, of course, are not interested in a LTR with a woman who basically has no interest in your kids. Spot on. Aren't interested. I have no need to breed, anymore though.. But yeah. And you're right, except I am not interested in a LTR but that could change if I met someone cool. Hard to say.
3. These 20 something instagrammers? Uh, if you make it past San Diego, at some point, 9 times out of ten, if things get serious, they are going to want to pump out additional cf with YOU. Run, Forrest, Run. No need to run, because they'll run when they find out I got clipped after kid number 2. That has actually worked in my favor with a few of these girls. When you tell them you've had a vasectomy they want you just blow it in there, which rules.

There are no easy answers. I do thank you for your contributions, the domestic pinshitting home improvement scene needed some spice. 5/7 would rather read about poonslayer.com than Zil digging holes in the frozen tundra. Hahaha. I haven't read his thread. You guys have been doing this forum for too long and theres no way I could catch up with all those independent threads.. I skimmed yours, max's etc. I'll try to get to more but there are some with EPIC content. Plus I am not as much a car brah as some brahs on here and my intrigue level drops off pretty quick when some guy has a 70 page thread about a 2003 V6 Camry that he put a big turbo on or something..
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Thanks brodozer. I try.
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Desertbreh wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 12:42 pm
razr390 wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 7:33 am Hi McQueen. Nice story. Don’t that shit again. you don’t have any sympathy from me for drunk driving. Those CHP guys were your guardian angels, because I’m sure your pucker factor sobered you up quickly and them pulling you over could’ve prevented you from wrapping your shit around a tree or running a red light in an intersection, not only fucking your life up but possibly many others’

So, again, lucky man, but you won’t garner much sympathy with this sort of behavior here.
Eh, he had the balls to share a story about being a royal fuckup and getting away with it, that one one time. Its good content, and I'll allow it.
:dat:

I knew some :narc: would come in and shit on him... but he acknowledged it was stupid as fuck and vowed not to do it again.

I’ve driven drunk, not often, but more times than I like to admit. Pre Lyft/Uber shit was harder.

I once went through a traffic stop in Miami on my way home from working a gig as a sound guy at a club. I’d housed like six makers and gingers and was puckering hard. :narc: asked what I was doing, I said heading home from work as a sound bro, he eyed some headphones and mics on my passenger seat and sent me on my way...

No one has a perfect history.
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D Griff wrote: Sat Nov 16, 2019 12:04 pm
Desertbreh wrote: Thu Nov 14, 2019 12:42 pm

Eh, he had the balls to share a story about being a royal fuckup and getting away with it, that one one time. Its good content, and I'll allow it.
:dat:

I knew some :narc: would come in and shit on him... but he acknowledged it was stupid as fuck and vowed not to do it again.

I’ve driven drunk, not often, but more times than I like to admit. Pre Lyft/Uber shit was harder.

I once went through a traffic stop in Miami on my way home from working a gig as a sound guy at a club. I’d housed like six makers and gingers and was puckering hard. :narc: asked what I was doing, I said heading home from work as a sound bro, he eyed some headphones and mics on my passenger seat and sent me on my way...

No one has a perfect history.
I guess some people just feel compelled to state the incredibly obvious and scold people on the internets :iono:

Yeah man, basically unless you are sober or a mormon or something, almost everyone you have ever met has gotten behind the wheel with enough booze in their blood to blow over. Doesn't take much, at all. I was definitely way over which is unacceptable, but it really doesnt take much at all. And if you read the fine print as far as DUI limits and laws in CA it is up to the police discretion, so even if you blow under, they can still fuck with you. Yes, you could prob get a lawyer and get off but it would still be a huge ordeal even if you did. Bottom line is its practically zero tolerance. How many people have to dinner with their old lady and shared a bottle of wine and then driven home? Yeah, just about everyone. I have personally known people who have gotten DUI's for very little.

Now in my case, having 5 drinks and doing 100+ MPH at 12:30am on the highway.... that is just sheer stupidity. If I would have gotten a DUI, I would have deserved it, 100% but the DUI industry is a huge business and total cash cow and having to shell out $15k and deal w/everything else that comes with a DUI for having a few drinks at dinner and driving home is fucking ridiculous.

Curious what the current stance is on cannabis and DWI... Do they have test kits for that? Because I know 1000000 dipshits in LA now who eat edibles all day long and use their gay little vape pens all day and drive basically constantly, as if its a non issue.
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This is part of why I try not to go to bars and restaurants, besides the fact that they are overpriced and often too loud anyway.
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McQueenBalls wrote: Sat Nov 16, 2019 2:08 pm
D Griff wrote: Sat Nov 16, 2019 12:04 pm

:dat:

I knew some :narc: would come in and shit on him... but he acknowledged it was stupid as fuck and vowed not to do it again.

I’ve driven drunk, not often, but more times than I like to admit. Pre Lyft/Uber shit was harder.

I once went through a traffic stop in Miami on my way home from working a gig as a sound guy at a club. I’d housed like six makers and gingers and was puckering hard. :narc: asked what I was doing, I said heading home from work as a sound bro, he eyed some headphones and mics on my passenger seat and sent me on my way...

No one has a perfect history.
I guess some people just feel compelled to state the incredibly obvious and scold people on the internets :iono:

Yeah man, basically unless you are sober or a mormon or something, almost everyone you have ever met has gotten behind the wheel with enough booze in their blood to blow over. Doesn't take much, at all. I was definitely way over which is unacceptable, but it really doesnt take much at all. And if you read the fine print as far as DUI limits and laws in CA it is up to the police discretion, so even if you blow under, they can still fuck with you. Yes, you could prob get a lawyer and get off but it would still be a huge ordeal even if you did. Bottom line is its practically zero tolerance. How many people have to dinner with their old lady and shared a bottle of wine and then driven home? Yeah, just about everyone. I have personally known people who have gotten DUI's for very little.

Now in my case, having 5 drinks and doing 100+ MPH at 12:30am on the highway.... that is just sheer stupidity. If I would have gotten a DUI, I would have deserved it, 100% but the DUI industry is a huge business and total cash cow and having to shell out $15k and deal w/everything else that comes with a DUI for having a few drinks at dinner and driving home is fucking ridiculous.

Curious what the current stance is on cannabis and DWI... Do they have test kits for that? Because I know 1000000 dipshits in LA now who eat edibles all day long and use their gay little vape pens all day and drive basically constantly, as if its a non issue.
I’ve always found it odd that many consider driving while high “ just fine” as if they’ll drive as well as they would sober. Most are likely awful sober as is.

I have also driven after smoking before and it’s no bueno, you have the reactions of a fucking sloth.
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Zilcho to report with the car so I'll relay a good dong slinging story from the other day. This was a Tinder match thing, 36 yr old mom of a 6 yr old. Looked pretty good, I did what I do now which is arrange a quick daytime meetup, we grabbed lunch. Figure if they look alright and seem cool in broad daylight, sober @ noon, then you're alright vs. doing the lets meet in a dimly lit bar for the first time and have drinks.. That opens up the door for future shock factor.
So we do lunch, uneventful. Kind of a bookworm, far left white as the driven snow girl who works for the Getty on some admin level. Seemed kind of dorky, conservatively dressed but cute. We make plans to do drinks a week later, meet up, have some drinks. Due to my recent scare I Uber'd and all that and didn't drink too much anyway, maybe 3 drinks over the course of 2.5 hrs. She drove. We're waiting in her CX5 for my uber to come and she's like "maybe I should just come over" so over she came.
She was dressed conservatively on the date even, jeans, sweater, etc. Turns out she is one of these secret weapon types where her body is pretty firing and she was like, I mean, she was adventurous. Just going for it, wants me to talk dirty etc. and I've got semi drunk dick so I'm just throwing dong full tilt for a while and then she wants me to pop all over the double D's so I do. The juggz were a very pleasant surprise.

But then here were are, its 2am. She's like "do you want me to sleep over or not?" but its late and she's naked and I'm like yah, ok fine. But I can't sleep. She's laying there, she is fully sleeping and I'm basically up most of the night. Im having anxiety that she's gonna want to do the extended morning hang because she heard me say earlier I didnt have to be back to work until noon. So I get up at 7, jump in the shower, tell her I gotta get my kids and go in early and she's up and dressed and out of there. Before she leaves she's like "sorry I ruined your sleep, I should have left". And I'm thinking, yes, ideally we would have knocked it out around midnight, you would have left and I could then finish this season of Mindhunter with a cold one on my couch in peace but I was like "no it was fine.." So I figure that was it, we're done. But then she makes plans to bone zone this friday, during the day before she has to go get her kid.

So there you go. day in the life. I never would have been able to post this on the Bimmer forums...
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McQueenBalls wrote: Mon Nov 25, 2019 5:13 pm Zilcho to report with the car so I'll relay a good dong slinging story from the other day. This was a Tinder match thing, 36 yr old mom of a 6 yr old. Looked pretty good, I did what I do now which is arrange a quick daytime meetup, we grabbed lunch. Figure if they look alright and seem cool in broad daylight, sober @ noon, then you're alright vs. doing the lets meet in a dimly lit bar for the first time and have drinks.. That opens up the door for future shock factor.
So we do lunch, uneventful. Kind of a bookworm, far left white as the driven snow girl who works for the Getty on some admin level. Seemed kind of dorky, conservatively dressed but cute. We make plans to do drinks a week later, meet up, have some drinks. Due to my recent scare I Uber'd and all that and didn't drink too much anyway, maybe 3 drinks over the course of 2.5 hrs. She drove. We're waiting in her CX5 for my uber to come and she's like "maybe I should just come over" so over she came.
She was dressed conservatively on the date even, jeans, sweater, etc. Turns out she is one of these secret weapon types where her body is pretty firing and she was like, I mean, she was adventurous. Just going for it, wants me to talk dirty etc. and I've got semi drunk dick so I'm just throwing dong full tilt for a while and then she wants me to pop all over the double D's so I do. The juggz were a very pleasant surprise.

But then here were are, its 2am. She's like "do you want me to sleep over or not?" but its late and she's naked and I'm like yah, ok fine. But I can't sleep. She's laying there, she is fully sleeping and I'm basically up most of the night. Im having anxiety that she's gonna want to do the extended morning hang because she heard me say earlier I didnt have to be back to work until noon. So I get up at 7, jump in the shower, tell her I gotta get my kids and go in early and she's up and dressed and out of there. Before she leaves she's like "sorry I ruined your sleep, I should have left". And I'm thinking, yes, ideally we would have knocked it out around midnight, you would have left and I could then finish this season of Mindhunter with a cold one on my couch in peace but I was like "no it was fine.." So I figure that was it, we're done. But then she makes plans to bone zone this friday, during the day before she has to go get her kid.

So there you go. day in the life. I never would have been able to post this on the Bimmer forums...
As an Olde married guy, this sounds pretty baller to me..... she sounds oh, so, sexy librarian which is very much my type...... grass is always greener
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McQueenBalls wrote: Mon Nov 25, 2019 5:13 pm Zilcho to report with the car so I'll relay a good dong slinging story from the other day. This was a Tinder match thing, 36 yr old mom of a 6 yr old. Looked pretty good, I did what I do now which is arrange a quick daytime meetup, we grabbed lunch. Figure if they look alright and seem cool in broad daylight, sober @ noon, then you're alright vs. doing the lets meet in a dimly lit bar for the first time and have drinks.. That opens up the door for future shock factor.
So we do lunch, uneventful. Kind of a bookworm, far left white as the driven snow girl who works for the Getty on some admin level. Seemed kind of dorky, conservatively dressed but cute. We make plans to do drinks a week later, meet up, have some drinks. Due to my recent scare I Uber'd and all that and didn't drink too much anyway, maybe 3 drinks over the course of 2.5 hrs. She drove. We're waiting in her CX5 for my uber to come and she's like "maybe I should just come over" so over she came.
She was dressed conservatively on the date even, jeans, sweater, etc. Turns out she is one of these secret weapon types where her body is pretty firing and she was like, I mean, she was adventurous. Just going for it, wants me to talk dirty etc. and I've got semi drunk dick so I'm just throwing dong full tilt for a while and then she wants me to pop all over the double D's so I do. The juggz were a very pleasant surprise.

But then here were are, its 2am. She's like "do you want me to sleep over or not?" but its late and she's naked and I'm like yah, ok fine. But I can't sleep. She's laying there, she is fully sleeping and I'm basically up most of the night. Im having anxiety that she's gonna want to do the extended morning hang because she heard me say earlier I didnt have to be back to work until noon. So I get up at 7, jump in the shower, tell her I gotta get my kids and go in early and she's up and dressed and out of there. Before she leaves she's like "sorry I ruined your sleep, I should have left". And I'm thinking, yes, ideally we would have knocked it out around midnight, you would have left and I could then finish this season of Mindhunter with a cold one on my couch in peace but I was like "no it was fine.." So I figure that was it, we're done. But then she makes plans to bone zone this friday, during the day before she has to go get her kid.

So there you go. day in the life. I never would have been able to post this on the Bimmer forums...
THis is the best it gets internet freedom of speech wise. If you don't mind being called :wrong: constantly and getting burned at the stake for driving once after consuming five beers.
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Pics of the victim ? Sounds like a fun night
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max225 wrote: Mon Nov 25, 2019 5:22 pm Pics of the victim ? Sounds like a fun night
twas. the magic was after she left, I went up the hill, picked up the kids, took them to school then went back home and crashed for a few hours before going to work. I'm stoked she's down to continue. She seems to be looking for a relationship but has probably already sussed out that aint gonna be me. So I'll ride it out for the time being.

This is the only pic I have, she has 1 profile pic on the Tind.. And I was wrong, 38. This I find is becoming the top of my age range.

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:woodplow: especially with some DDs on there
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Damn she looks 28 in that pic !
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