OT 19: Masks On, Clothes Off, Right Hand Left Titty

[Tar]

Yeah man, I'm implimenting every advantage possible to give my kids the tools that they need to self-sufficient and successful. If it helps them to have a mode of transportation to get to a job then they can have it, or at least get part of it subsided, otherwise they are stuck in a catch 22: need car to keep job, need job to pay for car.

This this this. If my kids show they deserve it (which is via hard work and good attitudes) I'm going to give them every single advantage I can give them. If they don't show me that they deserve it then I need to examine how I'm parenting and get us all into therapy.

Listen, this isn't fair, but the world isn't fair. As long as the world is organized in the way it is, I'm certainly going to play the game.

Same shit in the animal kingdom, a robin will find as much food for its chicks as it can, and teach them how to fly with the skill sets that it has available to it, and provide a safe nest and warmth at night. Some do better then others at these tasks. The birds with plenty of the above grow up and thrive. So it isn't "privilege" so much as survival in my opinion.

You make a great point about owning your child's attitude. I'm owning my kids attitude from day one and have taken a lot of proactive steps to set them on a decent course, if I fail it is my issue. There are so many things that I still need to work on, including my laziness in some aspects of parenting, like reprimanding poor behavior or not proactively educating them in times when my mental or emotional tank is low.

Once they are adults they will own their own successes and failures, and I'm not sure what age that will be but will gauge it on their mental readiness to "fly" or whatever metaphor suits. At that point I'll take a more passive approach and offer wisdom when it is requested, and encouragement as I feel people need even as adults. Hopefully we will be friends at that time.

[ChrisoftheNorth]

We've spent the last month living with nothing more than a Futon, a cast iron pan, a tea kettle, and a coffee press in a run-down house in the middle of the woods. I've never been happier.

It's made me reassess a lot, and I suspect we'll be selling a lot of stuff and not replacing it living a far simpler life from here on out.

Happiness is about being happy with everything you have (relationship, location, activities, etc), stuff and fanciness is a band-aid if there's underlying issues with other things.

[Calvinball]

We've spent the last month living with nothing more than a Futon, a cast iron pan, a tea kettle, and a coffee press in a run-down house in the middle of the woods. I've never been happier.

It's made me reassess a lot, and I suspect we'll be selling a lot of stuff and not replacing it living a far simpler life from here on out.

Happiness is about being happy with everything you have (relationship, location, activities, etc), stuff and fanciness is a band-aid if there's underlying issues with other things.

I love this.

[troyguitar]

We've spent the last month living with nothing more than a Futon, a cast iron pan, a tea kettle, and a coffee press in a run-down house in the middle of the woods. I've never been happier.

It's made me reassess a lot, and I suspect we'll be selling a lot of stuff and not replacing it living a far simpler life from here on out.

Happiness is about being happy with everything you have (relationship, location, activities, etc), stuff and fanciness is a band-aid if there's underlying issues with other things.

So changing your entire environment (except for the wife) is all it took for you, eh?

Sounds familiar. I'm glad one of us got there.

[D Griff]

It is interesting to be able to observe my kid participating in her kindergarten class.

Is it 100% remote for you guys?

FWIW as the spouse of an educator, parents hanging out on Zoom all day with the kids in school can be pretty distracting/intimidating for teachers. I know y'all both work so I'm sure you're not doing that, but something to keep in mind, it's kind of like presenting at work to a customer with your boss watching or something.

[razr390]

It is interesting to be able to observe my kid participating in her kindergarten class.

Is it 100% remote for you guys?

FWIW as the spouse of an educator, parents hanging out on Zoom all day with the kids in school can be pretty distracting/intimidating for teachers. I know y'all both work so I'm sure you're not doing that, but something to keep in mind, it's kind of like presenting at work to a customer with your boss watching or something.

I feel like it’s more accurate the older they are tho? Maybe elementary/preschool/etc is more necessary to have the parent there for technical stuff too.

SO’s little brothers both go alone though

[D Griff]

So far pretty good. It was probably much different in the spring, and I also imagine that there’s a little luck of the draw with what teacher you get. Couple little technical hiccups but nothing major.

She gets annoyed when she knows an answer and someone else gets called on lol

Jul and I were having a his discussion a few nights ago. If you're 60 and have been teaching one way for 35 years, this is probably a much harder transition than if you're 30.

It's pretty challenging for all of them, but definitely worse for olds/technically challenged which seems to be many teachers. It's funny, Allison has been aggravated for years as a digital learning coach/director/facilitator about how so many teachers just refuse to use and integrate technology, think it is stupid, and don't want any part of it in their classrooms. The joke is on all of them now.

[razr390]

We've spent the last month living with nothing more than a Futon, a cast iron pan, a tea kettle, and a coffee press in a run-down house in the middle of the woods. I've never been happier.

It's made me reassess a lot, and I suspect we'll be selling a lot of stuff and not replacing it living a far simpler life from here on out.

Happiness is about being happy with everything you have (relationship, location, activities, etc), stuff and fanciness is a band-aid if there's underlying issues with other things.

So changing your entire environment (except for the wife) is all it took for you, eh?

Sounds familiar. I'm glad one of us got there.

Chris seemed pretty satisfied with life in general even before the move, though. Sure there were things he abhorred but for the most part him and his wife were generally about life and the outlook, etc.

Moving to cabin in the woods for a month only furthered their perspective and showed them that this is a plausible next chapter in their life.

TL;DR: enjoy where you are/what you have while you work toward what you want. That’s it. That’s the secret.

[4zilch]

We've spent the last month living with nothing more than a Futon, a cast iron pan, a tea kettle, and a coffee press in a run-down house in the middle of the woods. I've never been happier.

It's made me reassess a lot, and I suspect we'll be selling a lot of stuff and not replacing it living a far simpler life from here on out.

Happiness is about being happy with everything you have (relationship, location, activities, etc), stuff and fanciness is a band-aid if there's underlying issues with other things.

x1000 - there's not many that ever recognize this.

[razr390]

Jul and I were having a his discussion a few nights ago. If you're 60 and have been teaching one way for 35 years, this is probably a much harder transition than if you're 30.

It's pretty challenging for all of them, but definitely worse for olds/technically challenged which seems to be many teachers. It's funny, Allison has been aggravated for years as a digital learning coach/director/facilitator about how so many teachers just refuse to use and integrate technology, think it is stupid, and don't want any part of it in their classrooms. The joke is on all of them now.

Allison pulling the at teachers while she is a master at the technical stuff and got a 15% raise for it as well.

[D Griff]

Is it 100% remote for you guys?

FWIW as the spouse of an educator, parents hanging out on Zoom all day with the kids in school can be pretty distracting/intimidating for teachers. I know y'all both work so I'm sure you're not doing that, but something to keep in mind, it's kind of like presenting at work to a customer with your boss watching or something.

I feel like it’s more accurate the older they are tho? Maybe elementary/preschool/etc is more necessary to have the parent there for technical stuff too.

SO’s little brothers both go alone though

Not saying having the parents around is bad of course, but when they are listening to everything you're saying and doing, it puts additional strain on. It is of course necessary with a kindergartener starting out, she won't know how to join a video conference or whatever, but as the year progresses and with 7 or 8+ year old kids, they are pretty self sufficient. Most of them are better at iPads/phones/tablets than I am in fact

[Calvinball]

It is interesting to be able to observe my kid participating in her kindergarten class.

Is it 100% remote for you guys?

FWIW as the spouse of an educator, parents hanging out on Zoom all day with the kids in school can be pretty distracting/intimidating for teachers. I know y'all both work so I'm sure you're not doing that, but something to keep in mind, it's kind of like presenting at work to a customer with your boss watching or something.

Yep our district decided to start the year 100% virtual.

And yeah, I figured, we’re just kinda keeping an ear out but staying hands off.

[D Griff]

It's pretty challenging for all of them, but definitely worse for olds/technically challenged which seems to be many teachers. It's funny, Allison has been aggravated for years as a digital learning coach/director/facilitator about how so many teachers just refuse to use and integrate technology, think it is stupid, and don't want any part of it in their classrooms. The joke is on all of them now.

Allison pulling the at teachers while she is a master at the technical stuff and got a 15% raise for it as well.

She more or less runs the place now But fortunately she has been recognized/compensated for those efforts.

[troyguitar]

I feel like it’s more accurate the older they are tho? Maybe elementary/preschool/etc is more necessary to have the parent there for technical stuff too.

SO’s little brothers both go alone though

Not saying having the parents around is bad of course, but when they are listening to everything you're saying and doing, it puts additional strain on. It is of course necessary with a kindergartener starting out, she won't know how to join a video conference or whatever, but as the year progresses and with 7 or 8+ year old kids, they are pretty self sufficient. Most of them are better at iPads/phones/tablets than I am in fact

My sister's 5 year old is probably better with an iPad/iPhone than I am. I have no clue how to use apple stuff and he's glued to it all day.

[D Griff]

Is it 100% remote for you guys?

FWIW as the spouse of an educator, parents hanging out on Zoom all day with the kids in school can be pretty distracting/intimidating for teachers. I know y'all both work so I'm sure you're not doing that, but something to keep in mind, it's kind of like presenting at work to a customer with your boss watching or something.

Yep our district decided to start the year 100% virtual.

And yeah, I figured, we’re just kinda keeping an ear out but staying hands off.

makes sense, especially as she's getting into the groove. Sounds like she's pretty much crushing it .

[Calvinball]

I feel like it’s more accurate the older they are tho? Maybe elementary/preschool/etc is more necessary to have the parent there for technical stuff too.

SO’s little brothers both go alone though

Not saying having the parents around is bad of course, but when they are listening to everything you're saying and doing, it puts additional strain on. It is of course necessary with a kindergartener starting out, she won't know how to join a video conference or whatever, but as the year progresses and with 7 or 8+ year old kids, they are pretty self sufficient. Most of them are better at iPads/phones/tablets than I am in fact

Yeah the “coursework” so far these two days has had a lot of teaching how to do the things they need to. Her teacher has had blown up picture cards to show, for example, what the mute button looks like both on and off.

[razr390]

We've spent the last month living with nothing more than a Futon, a cast iron pan, a tea kettle, and a coffee press in a run-down house in the middle of the woods. I've never been happier.

It's made me reassess a lot, and I suspect we'll be selling a lot of stuff and not replacing it living a far simpler life from here on out.

Happiness is about being happy with everything you have (relationship, location, activities, etc), stuff and fanciness is a band-aid if there's underlying issues with other things.

x1000 - there's not many that ever recognize this.

so are you going to sell your FiST and motorcycles and donate your time to charity bro?! Do you even smile every day?

[4zilch]

So changing your entire environment (except for the wife) is all it took for you, eh?

Sounds familiar. I'm glad one of us got there.

Chris seemed pretty satisfied with life in general even before the move, though. Sure there were things he abhorred but for the most part him and his wife were generally about life and the outlook, etc.

Moving to cabin in the woods for a month only furthered their perspective and showed them that this is a plausible next chapter in their life.

TL;DR: enjoy where you are/what you have while you work toward what you want. That’s it. That’s the secret.

I question the bolded a little bit as for many people it tends to be "more stuff" that you think will make you happy/complete. Whether that's earning enough to retire or retire early, start a business, or buy that vacation home...

Having the perspective to enjoy living in the moment - or at least being content in the moment - will generally lead to a more fulfilled life in the long term.

[razr390]

I feel like it’s more accurate the older they are tho? Maybe elementary/preschool/etc is more necessary to have the parent there for technical stuff too.

SO’s little brothers both go alone though

Not saying having the parents around is bad of course, but when they are listening to everything you're saying and doing, it puts additional strain on. It is of course necessary with a kindergartener starting out, she won't know how to join a video conference or whatever, but as the year progresses and with 7 or 8+ year old kids, they are pretty self sufficient. Most of them are better at iPads/phones/tablets than I am in fact

Yeah the over the shoulder stuff can be intimidating for sure. Like how it feels to drive alone versus with your parent in the passenger seat. Even if I am a good driver whenever my mom or dad is with me I always feel like I’m being judged and watched

[Melon]

Having the perspective to enjoy living in the moment - or at least being content in the moment - will generally lead to a more fulfilled life in the long term.

[Melon]

Life is too short to fret the small stuff.
Or, even the large stuff.

[razr390]

Chris seemed pretty satisfied with life in general even before the move, though. Sure there were things he abhorred but for the most part him and his wife were generally about life and the outlook, etc.

Moving to cabin in the woods for a month only furthered their perspective and showed them that this is a plausible next chapter in their life.

TL;DR: enjoy where you are/what you have while you work toward what you want. That’s it. That’s the secret.

I question the bolded a little bit as for many people it tends to be "more stuff" that you think will make you happy/complete. Whether that's earning enough to retire or retire early, start a business, or buy that vacation home...

Having the perspective to enjoy living in the moment - or at least being content in the moment - will generally lead to a more fulfilled life in the long term.

Of course. Working toward what we want is subjective though. It could be a goal, a skill, or a specific point of living. Not the same for everyone and that’s the key factor here.

[D Griff]

Not saying having the parents around is bad of course, but when they are listening to everything you're saying and doing, it puts additional strain on. It is of course necessary with a kindergartener starting out, she won't know how to join a video conference or whatever, but as the year progresses and with 7 or 8+ year old kids, they are pretty self sufficient. Most of them are better at iPads/phones/tablets than I am in fact

Yeah the “coursework” so far these two days has had a lot of teaching how to do the things they need to. Her teacher has had blown up picture cards to show, for example, what the mute button looks like both on and off.

One of the tricky things seems to be teaching them how to use the tech while they are simultaneously in the call program on the device... so if you have Zoom open on your iPad, it's tricky to see/use other required applications.

[wap]

Other than Canada a couple times and visiting the Caribbean and Mexico while taking 10 cruises, no. To be perfectly honest, I really have no interest in any other parts of the world. If Australia and New Zealand weren't so fucking far I might be interested in going there, but no place in Asia, or the Middle East really grabbed me. I know that's completely , and a massive failing on my part, but it is what it is. There are one or 2 places in South America that I'd like to see. Mrs went to Santiago, Chili on business once and loved it so I'd like to go there with her, and I once read an interesting article many years ago about Uruguay and it sounded very interesting so I'd like to visit Montevideo some day.

But really, Europe scratches almost every travel itch I have. I say almost because I also love to do long road trips in Murica to state and national parks.

Got it. You seem to travel a lot and spoke about Europe quite highly, so I was just curious.

[wap]

NJ had a 3.1 earthquake last night.

I was gonna ask if you guys out east felt it.

I'm behind this morning so apologies if you've already answered this. I'll catch up shortly.